by CHRIS BARRY

A midwife, registered nurse, massage therapist and one delightfully horny chick, Sheri Winston may well know more about sex and maximizing pleasure than anyone you'll ever meet. Better yet, she's on a virtual crusade to share her knowledge with the rest of the world, determined to help as many people as possible in the effort to realize their sexual potential. In town this week to conduct a series of workshops, Sheri guarantees the two to three hours you spend in her classroom will result in a lifetime of better, infinitely more intense sex than you ever imagined possible. Recognizing an opportunity to pick up a few valuable "pointers," the Mirror recently sat down with the Divine Miss W to get the 411 on her unique, "wholistic" approach to the ancient art of boinkin'.

Mirror: So what's the scoop with this wholistic sexuality stuff?

Sheri Winston: I've developed a whole new paradigm of sexuality, wholistic sexuality, because I think our current cultural paradigm sucks. So I've made a new one. The foundation being that sexuality is first and foremost about our relationship with ourselves. And by wholistic I mean wholistic in the broadest sense, encompassing our relationship with our bodies, relationships we've had in the past, our current partners, what our parents told us, what our spiritual traditions have told us, what culture we live in and what communities we work in. Sexuality is more than one little piece of us that goes on behind closed bedroom doors.

M: How did you acquire your knowledge? Was it a matter of fooling around down there and going, "Ooh, that feels kind of good, I better start taking notes"?

SW: To a point, but surprisingly much of what I know about sex comes from being a midwife. You use much of the same equipment and hormones and chemicals and pathways for both things [sex and childbirth].

Keys to feminine arousal

M: Would you argue most people are sexually dysfunctional to some extent?

SW: I don't know if I'd use the word dysfunctional. I'd say sexuality is this journey we're on of exploration and discovery and of ideally expanding our repertoire. Women that have never had an orgasm can learn how to. Men can learn to be multi-orgasmic. People can learn to experiment with orgasms so they last a really long time and have the sensation throughout their bodies, not just their genitals.

M: What goes down in your "Maps of the Clitoris" workshop? Is it tricky stuff to learn?

SW: Nah, not at all. One workshop will do it. I give one workshop for men just devoted to women's sexuality - where everything is, what it is, why it's there, how it's connected, how to make it happy, all that stuff. The clitoris is just one piece of a really juicy, fabulous network of structures women have. There are six keys to feminine arousal: breath, sound, movement, vision, intention and awareness, and taste and smell. Sound is a foundation for extended arousal. Yet we have huge sound inhibitions because we're so ashamed about sex. Many of us, when we first started having sex, were doing it somewhere we didn't want to get caught. We didn't want our parents to hear us.

But if you really want the big arousal you've got to let your sound out, that's what amplifies the intensity. Men generally have a much harder time with breath and sound than women. The common pattern for men and their sexuality is that they need to learn how to control their ejaculation. Like, when you first started masturbating it was all about how quickly you could get yourself off so you didn't get caught. And then suddenly you find yourself with a woman and you're expected to last a long time.

M: You are!? Wha?

SW: Uh huh… Most men learn to control their arousal by holding their breath, containing their energy and not making a sound. Keeping it contained until eventually it bursts out. But when men learn how to make sound and use their breath and start moving that energy around, they can start channelling that energy to experience full body orgasms.

Clitoral maps, fire breath

M: Do many people seek to go home with you after your workshops? Kind of like, "This Sheri broad must be one amazing fuck"?

SW: Well, many of the guys are there because they've partners who've encouraged them to attend.

M: Ooh, that's gotta hurt the ego a bit. Which workshops will you be giving in Montreal this weekend?

SW: "Maps of the Clitoris," for both men and women. "SexCraft," which is an introduction to wholistic sexuality. And "Expanding Arousal and Fire Breath Orgasm" - the first half of the class we do basic arousal skills and conclude with the fire breath orgasm meditation.

M: And what is that exactly?

SW: It's a 45-minute long meditation, with everybody lying on their own little mat and doing their own stuff with themselves.

M: Sweet.

SW: Well, everybody keeps their clothes on and nobody is playing with themselves, but you use all the tools you've learned to expand arousal in this meditation. I talk everybody through it and, with all the sexual energy in the room, some people end up having orgasms.

M: Really? Without touching themselves?

SW: Certainly.

M: Sounds like one damn fine workshop.

SW: Oh it's hot, it's so hot. But you're not watching. Your eyes are closed, you're hearing everybody and… yeah, it's hot. The first time I did it with a large group I was getting so off on it that at a certain point I lost track of where I was and couldn't even speak.

Energized senses

M: Yeah, were you coming?

SW: Well, I was, like, with the energy. But I can totally have orgasms during the workshop. Recently I was teaching a ritual called the Feast of the Senses, which you do with a partner. In the first half you're the receiver and the second half the giver. As the receiver you wear a blindfold while your partner sort of surpasses in delighting your senses with various methods of sound and touch et cetera. This was at an outdoor clothing-optional event where some people were already naked and coupled and people were, well, not quite fucking but just totally into each other. I was, like [orgasmic], "Okay, okay, I've got to stay coherent enough to speak here," but it isn't always easy.

M: I've done something similar to that with sexual partners but instead of a blindfold I've asked them to put a paper bag over their head.

SW: A paper bag!!?

M: Yeah, it might surprise you, but many chicks get offended when you ask them to do that.

SW: Uh huh, well, anyway, the beauty of the Feast of the Senses ritual is that you get to experience it from both sides.

M: It all sounds good to me, baby.

SW: [purring] Because it is, it most certainly is.

"Maps of the Clitoris," June 24, 8:30 pm, and "SexCraft," June 25 at Come as You Are (5427 St-Laurent, 495-0444), 7:30pm, $25. "Expanding Arousal and Fire Breath Orgasm," June 26, at Mélange Magique (1928 Ste-Catherine W., 938-1458), 2pm, $25. Call ahead to register