1. Father Emmett “Pops” Johns
2. Leonard Cohen
3. William Shatner
4. Pierre Trudeau
5. Justin Trudeau
6. Saku Koivu
7. Bob Gainey
8. Celine Dion
9. Vic Vogel
10. Ryan Larkin
Honourable mentions: Red Fisher • Guy A Lepage • Brother André

Still many of the same saints, though new on the list are jazz legend Vogel and late, troubled animator Larkin, who died last Valentine’s Day.

1. Gérald Tremblay
2. Karla Homolka
3. Celine Dion
4. Jean Charest
5. Guy Cloutier
6. André Boisclair
7. Kimveer Gill
8. Mosé Persico
9. Ben Mulroney
10. Alexei Kovalev
Honourable mentions: William Shatner • Pierre Bourque • Justin Trudeau

A year ago, nobody had heard of Kimveer “Trench” Gill, the Dawson College shooter, and here he is now at number seven. The mayor retains his top spot, thanks no doubt to the Park Avenue fiasco, as does dear Karla, now living the anonymous life somewhere in the Montreal area. Lock up your daughters, folks, because Guy Cloutier is back on the streets! The music impresario and child molester was released last June after serving less than half of his 42-month sentence. And Alexei Kovalev’s constant bitching about the Canadiens to Russkie newspapers has finally earned him the opprobrium of the people paying his $4.5-million salary.

1. Justin Trudeau
2. Sam Roberts
3. Sheldon Souray
4. Rufus Wainwright
5. Leonard Cohen
6. Plastik Patrik
7. William Shatner
8. Memo (ICM Records)
9. Roy Dupuis
10. Jonas
Honourable mentions: Dave Gossage • Daniel Roberts • Jean Leloup

Last year’s top two switch spots (what we’d give for a mud-wrestling death match for all-time honours!), while Sam watches younger brother Daniel crack the Honourable mentions for the first time. Jonas’s dishy ubiquitous metro posters also seem to have seeped into our collective subconscious. As for Dave Gossage? About time he made it on this list!

1. Celine Dion
2. Mitsou
3. Elisha Cuthbert
4. Lara Roxx
5. Melissa Auf der Maur
6. Mutsumi Takahashi
7. Lil Tut
8. Izabelle Desjardins
9. Annie DeMelt
10. Jessica Paré

Honourable mentions: Bronwen Agnew • Jasmine Bleile • Karine Vanasse

Celine rockets up to number one from last year’s Honourable mention (when we referred to her as “horse-faced,” which we’ll refrain from this year), while Greenfield Park’s Cuthbert drops two spots, to third. Former porn starlet Lara Roxx, whose sad claim to fame was contracting HIV on a double-anal shoot in 2004, appears for the first time.

Best-dressed Montrealer

1. Maysr
2. Lil Tut
3. Keith Dean
4. Rufus Wainwright
5. Corneille
6. Leonard Cohen
7. Mado
8. Elisha Cuthbert
9. DJ Anonymous
10. Magenta Baribeau
Honourable mentions: Flashy Simon • Aleece Germano • Sheldon Souray

Maysr just has to be Best something, so if it isn’t Best Weirdo, which he campaigned hard against in the RantLine™ (for results, see below), maybe he’ll enjoy being the most dapper graf artist about town. He moves up from last year’s number six. Lil Tut and club DJ Keith Dean both make big gains, and Rufus may be too

busy working on his opera to care much about his appearance, slipping a couple of spots from 2006.

1. Malik Shaheed/Mosé Persico (tie!)
3. Ben Mulroney
4. Mado Lamotte
5. Celine Dion
6. Gregory Charles
7. JoJo Savard
8. Tasso
9. Frank Cavallaro
10. Michèle Richard
Honourable Mentions: Guy A. Lepage • Justin Trudeau • Thalia Devine • Dom Castelli • Jonas

For perhaps the first time in living memory, this most prestigious of categories yields two winners—Mosé, whose long reign at the top makes him the sentimental favourite, and MusiquePlus VJ Shaheed, who jumps three spots for the tie, edging the vacant-eyed Mulroney. Smiley, sweaty singer Charles appears for the first time, as does elevator-chanteuse Richard.

1. Willie Hollywood, the Banana Man
2. NOT Maysr
3. One-armed man on Crescent aka Stumpy
4. Spider Man
5. Maysr
6. Spoon Man
7. Mado
8. Jack the bearded tricycle guy
9. Three-Flute Busker
10. Plastik Patrik
Honourable mentions: Troll guy • Stilts guy • Screaming lady

How do you measure success? Man-about-town Maysr openly asked Montrealers NOT to vote him Best Montreal Weirdo, and Montrealers complied. Some of them, anyway (see #2 & #5). Sorry Maysr, the people have spoken, and they’ve told us you’re still a weirdo.

1. None/Doesn’t exist/No such thing/Ha ha ha!
2. Jean Charest
3. Mario Dumont
4. Justin Trudeau
5. Amir Khadir
6. Stéphane Dion
7. Pierre Trudeau
8. Jack Layton
9. Françoise David
10. André Boisclair
Honourable mentions: Gérald Tremblay • Richard Bergeron • Gilles Duceppe • Yolande James • Helen Fotopulos • Philippe Couillard

Is Justin Trudeau finally emerging out of his father’s shadow? Seems like it! You read it here first! At least our political dynasties won’t result in catastrophe. And remember: Just because Mario Dumont went to Concordia, he’s from and represents Rivière du Loup. So blame them.

1. Environment/Global Warming/Climate
2. Save Park Ave.
3. Health care
4. Legalize Marijuana/Bloc Pot
5. Peace/Anti-war/Stop Bush
6. Solidarity Across Borders
7. Dans la rue
8. Homeless
9. Communist Party/Marxism
10. Tuition freeze
Honourable mentions: Cleaning up Montreal • Affordable housing • AIDS

Seems all this news about collapsing ice shelves, drowning polar bears and terrifying hurricanes is finally sinking in. But if anything really got Montrealers riled, it was the incredibly bone-headed move to rename Park Avenue after Robert Bourassa, which did no one any good and may have long-standing consequences for hapless mayor Gérald Tremblay.

1. Jaggi Singh
2. Alison Louder
3. Students
4. Steven Guilbeault
5. Stefan Christoff
6. Tommy Schnurmacher
7. Linda Sullivan
8. Aaron Lakoff
9. Yves Engler
10. Peter Sergakis
Honourable mentions: Françoise David • Amir Khadir • Ethan Cox • Paul Cargnello

Singh remains Montreal’s most popular (or at least well-known) activist, but newcomer Alison Louder made her noisome bones with the Park Avenue debacle. Students are still cheesed off, and will continue to be as tuition hikes are definitely in the future, while strip-club owner Peter Sergakis leads the anti-anti-smoking law charge. Mirror writer Samer Elatrash, meanwhile, is officially no longer eligible in this category, as he is no longer an activist. Got it?