by RAF KATIGBAK

If you haven't already realized it, this Friday is a Friday the 13th. And while the film franchise bearing the same name tries desperately to hang on with painfully lame crossovers (rumour has it the next Friday the 13th will be Jason vs. Freddy vs. Alien vs. Predator vs. hobbits vs. Hilary Duff), the general population's superstitious heebie-jeebies surrounding this date continues.

But is Friday the 13th really that bad for you? According to a 1992 British study, "The risk of hospital admission as a result of a transport accident may be increased by as much as 52 per cent on Friday the 13th." Ever wary of those wily Brits (nationalize dental care, then we'll talk), Disko Akimbo decided to talk to some DJs who will be in the unholy trenches, risking their souls and perhaps their lives, by playing records this Friday.

Plastik Patrik (Saphir)

Mirror: Are you a superstitious person?

Plastik Patrik: Only for entertainment purposes. I like to do a little special something on Friday the 13th.

M: Like what?

PP: Well, we do ritual where we hang a naked virgin woman from the ceiling and then we cut her up and eat the pieces. Oh, and the youngest male gets the cherry.

M: Really?

PP: No. I'm probably just gonna play more Cramps and Cure.

Sean Kosa (Circus)

M: What do you think of Friday the 13th?

Sean Kosa: I was born on a Friday the 13th!

M: Creepy.

SK: Not really, it just means that Friday the 13th is good luck for me. But maybe that explains why I have a 12-inch tail.

M: Aside from your prehensile tail and your ability to teleport yourself at whim, have you ever experienced any strange paranormal activity or unexplainable phenomenon?

SK: Well, I swear my grandma's house is haunted. You know, doors opening and shutting, the standard stuff. Oh! And there's this weird dripping sound... and it's not coming from my 12-inch tail.

Noah Pred (StereoBar)

M: Are you scared about playing this Friday?

Noah Pred: This is gonna come off as a little new age-y, but in Mayan culture, 13 is a sacred number. So I'm pretty stoked.

M: Oh, are you Mayan?

NP: No. But I've studied it a little. The other thing about 13 is that women naturally menstruate 13 times a year. The theory goes that the patriarchal society switched to a 12-month Gregorian calendar system to throw the females off, to confuse their cycle. But that's getting into some conspiracy-type shit.

M: So are you superstitious?

NP: No, not really.

Vorhees a jolly good fellow! Diskoakimbo@sympatico.ca

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