by RAF KATIGBAK

For many people, Easter is a special time. For Catholics, it's a time to gather together with family and friends to reflect on the resurrection of Jesus. For my friend Dan, however, it's also the scariest day of the year.

You see, Dan has a theory. "Okay, so, biblically speaking," he once explained to me excitedly, "Lazarus was like, the first guy to come back from the dead, right? But it was Jesus that brought him back, right? Then, after they nailed his ass, they put Jesus in a cave and dude came back to life big time! Ergo, Jesus was the King of the Zombies. Boom!"

He points to scriptures for proof, "Look at John 6:53-59. ‘Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life.' I mean, c'mon! When Jesus came out of the cave, he said, ‘Do not be afraid. Go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me.' What they didn't write down was what he probably said right after - ‘Braaaiiiiins!'"

While Dan's view on the Resurrection may get him stoned in certain parts of the world (although he was already pretty stoned when he came up with his theory), one thing's for sure. Whether you're alive or dead, it's time to crawl out of your caves and check out what's happening Easter weekend in Montreal.

While Bal en Blanc brings throngs of thongs to the Palais des Congrès for one of the largest after-hour gatherings of the year, local promoters hope to entice partygoers with a bunch of off-festival events. Saturday, drop by Velvet, where their Monokini night welcomes Calgary DJ/producer Jon Delerious for a stampede of funky, deep and dubby tech-house. Come check out why this guy's been namechecked by everyone from Gilles Peterson to Lee Burridge. Over at O Patro Vys the same night, it's time for the fourth installment of Lab Projects. Expect another evening of improv between some of the city's best VJs, DJs and live musicians. This time the theme is acoustic soul/dub and will include members of Kalmunity, Sevens Project, Determination Band and Belle Orchestre. For a smoking tech house party, check out Burning Down the House with DJs Mighty Kat, Vincent Lemieux, Luc Raymond and special guests Jason Hodges and Ernesto. Tix and info at Hub Musiques (845-8884).

If you're looking for a headier, psychedelic alternative to BEB on Sunday, Stereolab at Club Soda makes a great choice. If house is your game, try Parking for Angel Moraes or check out Circus where Mini, Chris P, Alain Vinet, G. O'Brien, Eddy Jasmin and Runner & the Jet will mix it up all night long.

Next Tuesday, head over to O Patro Vys at 6 p.m. for the free launch of Male or Female, a special dome-blowing DVD project with music by members of Front 242 and a slew of Canuck visual artists! After that, drop by El Salon for post-punkers TV on the Radio and T.O.'s much talked about contoller.controller.

Of course, tonight, if I don't see you at the Unicorns' triumphant return, opening for Blonde Redhead at Club Soda, then I'm sure I'll catch you at Parking, where Robert de la Gauthier will be dropping a special electro-tinged set with DJ Mini.

Thank you, Easta bunny! Diskoakimbo@sympatico.ca

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