by MATTHEW HAYS

It sounded like a truly bad idea. Since the franchise was running dry, why not simply remake the original? Perhaps it was the bad flashback to Gus Van Sant's Psycho debacle, but I was simply depressed by the prospect of a remake of Tobe Hooper's landmark chop-'em-up-and-fry-'em '74 epic, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, inspired by the same rural freak (Ed Gein) that triggered Psycho as well.

But director Marcus Nispel's new version feels strikingly fresh. Instead of doing a scene-by-scene retelling, he only relies on the very basics from the original and creates a whole load of new and improved bloody bells and whistles to keep us creeped out.

Or flat out disgusted, as it were. There is the usual set-up: young people roaming along in some backwater (when will they learn about hillbilly fucks and their hankering for human flesh?) in their van. With references to pot smoking and sexually transmitted diseases, you just know these kids are due for some kind of sordid comeuppance.

Those critics who give away the film's first trippy plot twist should be hog tied, sawed into pieces and served up for dinner to rural types. Nispel hits hard early on, and then he doesn't let up. There are freaks around every corner, and the desperate kids have to think on their feet to figure out if they're out to help the escape plan or are with the wackos.

Don't get me wrong: this is no classic. This is still the kind of movie in which character development means we get to learn the characters' first names. There's lots of chopping going on, but I wouldn't necessarily argue that it's any more horrid than what we saw in the '74 original. Still, this is a whole lot better than Wrong Turn, that recent sort-of remake of Massacre. With solid bits and pieces of black humour running throughout, this Massacre should sate the appetites of hardcore cannibal horror fans.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre opens Friday, Oct. 17

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