by RUPERT BOTTENBERG

Spewing out a stew of jagged ska, raucous punk punch and frathouse R&B crunch, beer-soaked Haligonian hooligans King Konqueror classify their sound as "frantic rock 'n' roll." No question, they know how to catapult a party into the danger zone. The Mirror located drummer Johnny Kong and guitarist Prince Brat and sized them up against their fearsome simian semi-namesake.

Mirror: The original '33 King Kong touted our fave ape as "the eighth wonder of the world." In terms of the world's wonders, where would you rank King Konqueror?

Johnny Kong: Number one.

Prince Brat: We're beyond number one! We're closer to zero. Or negative one. We're in our own godamn dimension!

M: Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson is now working on his King Kong remake. What are the band's feelings on the issue of hobbits?

JK: They're little hippies with hairy feet.

PB: Annoying. They get stuck in the treads of my boots.

M: The film King Kong vs. Godzilla sees the two titans, locked in combat, tumble off a cliff into the sea. Then a distant, unidentifiable figure emerges victorious. The American version claimed it was Kong, the Japanese said Godzilla. Assessed objectively, which do you think won?

JK: Maybe it was Mothra.

PB: Mechagodzilla beat them both at a gigantic destructive game of Marco Polo. I have the DVD.

M: Beloved '80s wrestler King Kong Bundy used "the Avalanche" as his trademarked "finishing manouevre." As each live performance draws to a close, does King Konqueror have a favourite devastating finishing manoeuvre?

JK: My favourite is the one-handed guitar-headstock-through-the-ceiling move - always a crowd-pleaser.

PB: Mine's called the Chinese Surprise. I jump 30 feet into the air, spinning on a vertical axis, extend my arms and land while still spinning like a helicopter, knocking down all the bad guys on the dancefloor. Then I continue to spin until I drill through the dancefloor, bore straight through the Earth and emerge for a surprise concert in China.

At le Swimming tonight, Thursday, May 1, 10pm, $5

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