M Hi, I’m a Redskin and when I read this shit about Nazis going to punk shows, I think to myself, are these punks FUCKING HIPPIES? If you guys don’t take care of your own shit, we’ll do it for you, but you might end up being a victim too. What’s this shit about punks not caring about politics? And by the way, if these Nazis are such brave guys, then why don’t they come to Redskin shows? We’ve got things going down every Friday night all over town. Why not come down? It’s up to you, pussies. [BLEEP!]

M I would like to talk about the Montreal music scene but, shit, it’s getting so complicated. I’ve got left-wing skinheads asking me if I think the same way as they do, and if I don’t, then apparently I’m against them. I’ve got right-wing skinheads who ask me the same question and say if I don’t think like them, then I’m against them. Personally, I hate the left and the right. Can’t I just be in the middle? I just play in a simple rock ’n’ roll band! [BLEEP!]

M This goes out to all those fucked-up skinheads calling in to defend themselves. Get a clue! If Adolf Hitler actually succeeded in what he wanted to do, unless you had blond hair and blue eyes you would be fucked, wouldn’t you? I’m a musician in the local scene and I’m getting tired of having to deal with these Nazi fucks coming to my friends’ bands’ concerts. If you want to hate any sort of race then stay where you belong and don’t come to our concerts, okay? [BLEEP!]

M This is for all the Nazi skinheads who have been showing up at my bar lately and trying to kick my ass because they think I’m a communist. One day your luck is going to run out. And yeah, the lead singer for Skrewdriver used to be a mod, you know why he died? He forgot to take a left turn. [BLEEP!]

M Concerning the Skrewdriver album that was at Primitive records. On the cover of the album, it says “100 per cent straight punk, no fascist junk.” It was their album from ’77 that was not racist at all. It was not the same members at that time. In the ’80s, it was totally different members - like two different bands. [BLEEP!]

M To the dude who has a problem with people selling Skrewdriver albums. If a place wants to sell this shit and someone wants to buy it, then it’s there business, like it or not. And if you want to look at it that way, a lot of your hip hop albums would be boycotted too. There are many, many hip hop albums that are anti-white, anti-gay, degrading towards women, you name it. But it’s called freedom of speech. And that’s something that seems to be compromised by the little PC dream world you want to live in. [BLEEP!]

M The Nazis are not the only ignorant meatheads out there. This guy UNCLE COSTA has made a career out of homophobic comments. First with Blood Sausage and now with Vulgar Deli. He dresses up his homophobia in an anti-politically correct discourse, but when you peel that away it’s just old-fashioned locker room hate. [BLEEP!]

F I’m calling from Steve’s Music Store and I’m looking at this Moshcore flyer that’s going on at Club Soda on January 10 and I have an objection. They have a NAKED CHICK with an SG guitar and I wanna know what the hell that has to do with Moshcore? And on top of everything, it’s a benefit for the Canadian Cancer Society. It has nothing to do with cancer. It has a naked girl in her underwear and an SG, that has nothing to do with heavy metal! It has nothing to do with “all proceeds go to the Canadian Cancer Society for young girls and boys.” As a female musician, honestly, it’s just insulting, it’s disgusting, it’s just gross. [BLEEP!]

M Just to clear up one little thing: the best drummer in Montreal is not the wimp from Cryptopsy, it’s not the wimp from the Discords, it’s Simon from Methamine. Once you hear this guy’s shit you can’t even think about another drummer again. End of story. [BLEEP!]

F Is David Suzuki hot? Oh yes he is! I’m in my mid-20s and aside from the ecology and nature stuff he’s in to, looking at and listening to him, oh yeah, I’d like a little romantic interlude with him if he wanted me. Oh yeah, big time! My friends also think he’s hot, probably just because he looks very, very sexy despite his age. [BLEEP!]

F Okay, to help you out, the only thing remotely hot about David Suzuki is his BRAIN. But this doesn’t apply to me because I like a man who’s super cute and dumb as a post. [BLEEP!]

M Here’s a question for the ages. Why do they call a cookie a cookie? Shouldn’t it be called a bakie? Just a thought. [BLEEP!]

Next week: Open forum