| Sizzlin’ celluloid! >> Where to get your dose of air-conditioned big-screen bliss by MARK SLUTSKY
Fight the future Apparently Spielberg’s starting work on Indiana Jones 4, but until then Harrison Ford heads will have to do with K-19: The Widowmaker, from director Kathryn Bigelow (Blue Steel, Strange Days). Ford stars as a Russian submarine captain facing a potential meltdown in this action-drama, based on a true story. That’s all fine and good, but the idea of seeing Han Solo speak with a Russian accent is slightly worrying (July 19). More stars! Mel Gibson and Joaquin Phoenix star in M. Night Shyamalan’s follow-up to that Unbreakable dud, Signs. This one has something to do with mysterious crop circles and I’d put money on there being some sort of shocking surprise ending (Aug. 2). Another potential biggie is the long-awaited (by some) sequel Men in Black 2 (click HERE for review). Will Smith, once king of the July 4 opening weekend, is back, as is Tommy Lee Jones, with an alien baddie played by Lara Flynn Boyle. Wasn’t Linda Fiorentino supposed to be in this one? And, like, what ever happened to her anyway? Barry Sonnenfeld directs (July 3). Annoying-meathead-with-undeniable-screen-presence Vin Diesel looks to be trying to start an action franchise himself with XXX, which has him playing some sort of extreme-sports James Bond. Finally, a secret agent who can rollerblade! Diesel’s The Fast and the Furious helmer Rob Cohen directs (Aug 2). I’m actually more excited about his TFTF costar Michelle Rodriguez’s latest project, Blue Crush, where she plays a tough surfer girl alongside newcomer Kate Bosworth. Directed by John Stockwell, who also did the almost-very-good crazy/beautiful, this could be a good time (July 12). Did somebody say “giant man-eating spiders?” Because that’s exactly what Eight Legged Freaks promises to deliver. This one looks like it might be pretty entertaining, with David Arquette fighting oversized mutant arachnids. How wrong can you go with that? (July 19).
Happy Mondays and hit men On to the serious stuff (and there’s more than usual this summer): Sam Mendes follows up his adored American Beauty with Road to Perdition, starring Tom Hanks. Mr. Nice Guy plays a noble Depression-era hitman travelling around the country with his son (newcomer Tyler Hoechlin). Don’t know about this one, what with the kid and all, but Paul Newman co-stars, which should be read as a good sign. Then again, his last movie was Message in a Bottle... (July 12). There’ll be some rare high-falutin’ fare as Gwyneth Paltrow and Aaron Eckhart star in Neil Labute’s adaptation of Possession, A.S. Byatt’s novel of academics in love (Aug. 30). The latest from the always-interesting Michael Winterbottom is 24 Hour Party People, chronicling the rise and fall of Manchester’s legendary Factory Records. It’ll be kind of strange to see someone playing Joy Division’s Ian Curtis, or the Happy Mondays’ eternally intoxicated Shaun Ryder, for that matter, but I’d give odds that Winterbottom can pull it off. The lovely Shirley Henderson (Topsy-Turvy, Winterbottom’s Wonderland) co-stars (Aug. 9). Whatever you thought of Ocean’s Eleven, Steven Soderbergh is still worth watching more often than not. Full Frontal is a star-studded, low-budget affair that he’s been saying is in the same vein as sex, lies, and videotape. Soderbergh can certainly attract talent: Julia Roberts, Catherine Keener, Brad Pitt, David Duchovny and David Hyde Pierce all star (Aug. 2). Continuing in his very welcome new nasty streak, Robin Williams stars in the Sundance hit One Hour Photo as deranged photo shop clerk who becomes dangerously obsessed with a family who frequents the place. A long overdue, very welcome career move from Mr. What Dreams May Come (July).
Funny business On the hilarity front, Mike Myers returns to the screen as Austin Powers in Goldmember. Beyoncé Knowles, of Destiny’s Child, appears as Blacksploitation-inspired ‘70s spy Foxxy Cleopatra, and Michael Caine apparently shows up as Powers père (July 26). Dana Carvey is back in action after a decade or so of recovery from botched heart surgery. We’ll see if he’s still got the chops in Master of Disguise, in which he plays the hapless heir to a dynasty of, well, masters of disguise. This one could go either way, but hey, his character’s name is Pistachio Disguisey, and that has to count for something (Aug. 16). And for the little ones, Robert Rodriguez returns with Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams, a sequel to last year’s terrific, gadget-filled kid flick. Ricardo Montalban (as Spy Grandpa) and Steve Buscemi join the ensemble-which includes Antonio Banderas, Daryl Sabara, Alex Vega and Carla Gugino (Aug. 7). Also for the kids, but probably less edifying, is Like Mike, which has junior rapper Lil’ Bow Wow playing a kid who finds a magic pair of brand-name sneakers once owned by Michael Jordan. Crispin Glover co-stars (July 12). Finally, the award for dumbest movie title this summer goes to Swimfan, about a high school swim star (Jesse Bradford) and the stalker (Erika Christensen) who loves him. Did we really need a new word for that? (Aug. 9). Dumbest movie concept goes to Halloween: Resurrection, the latest entry in the unkillable slasher franchise. A bunch of idiot kids set up a live webcast from Michael Myers’s old house and the dude comes back to kill them. A webcast? Is this the best these people can do? Busta Rhymes and Tyra Banks star, and Jamie Lee Curtis even co-stars-yeesh, with H20, we thought she’d put this sucker to rest for good. (July 19). |
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Summer
doesn’t officially start for another week, but try telling that
to the studios. Blockbuster season has already started, what with The
Scorpion King, Spider-Man and Star Wars already in theatres. Don’t
fret, though-there’s plenty more big dumb entertainment
on the way, and, as is customary, some off-kilter smaller movies to
provide a healthy dose of counter-programming. Sadly, Montreal’s
king of summer counter-programming, and the best local movie event of
the season (if not the year), Fantasia, won’t be with us this
July to stand up to the big boys. Hopefully, we’ll muddle through.
More
monster mayhem comes in the form of Reign of Fire, a sort of Mad-Max-meets-Dragonheart
scenario set in a future world where vicious dragons have almost wiped
out mankind. Matthew McConaughey, Christian Bale and newcomer Izabella
Scorupco play our intrepid, reptile-slaying heroes (July 12).
There’s
also a bunch of flicks which may very well be unfairly overlooked-despite
their low profile, keep an eye out for them. CQ is the debut feature
from Roman Coppola, son of the famous Francis Ford. Set in late-’60s
Paris, the movie has Jeremy Davies as an editor who takes over the helm
of a cheapo Barbarella-like flick (No set date yet).