by JOHNSON CUMMINS

What could be more extreme in its extremity than a whole Extreme Fest? Smack dab between Christmas and New Years Eve comes the Playstation 2 Presents Extreme Fest Musique Plus at the Bell Centre. Sports-wise, you’ve got displays of freestyle motorcross, skateboarding, rollerblading, over-the-top acrobatic ski jumps and BMX stunts c/o the Crazy Crew (they’re extremely crazy!).

Musically, you’ve got John Tesh jamming with Napalm Death… naw, that wouldn’t be extreme enough. No, you’ve got locals A Simple Plan, Grim Skunk, Fifty Nutz and Vulgaires Machins. The Mirror talked to reps from each of these Montreal bands, and each had a tale to tell that might better illustrate the true meaning of “extreme.”

Yann Bertrand
(bassist for Fifty Nutz)
“We were on tour with the Planet Smashers last November and we had just bought a 1979 van. We were in Buffalo on our way to New York and were in the middle lane doing about 60 miles an hour. Our back tire suddenly blew and we had to try and cut through about three lanes to get off the highway past cars and trucks. We really thought we were going to die because there were cars everywhere. Our drummer Laurent was driving that day and I had to drive for the rest of the day. We made the show and just drank beer all night. After that, we also lost our brakes, but that was one of the most extreme things we have ever been through. I feel that I should apologize to the Planet Smashers for almost killing one of their members because their trombone player was riding with us that day.”

Guillaume
(singer/guitarist, Vulgaires Machins)
“We played this show four years ago that our booking agent set up to kind of test us. There was this three-day kind of party in this rural area in Quebec. It was this party with crusty punks and people from the underground culture. Our guitarist got trashed by this other girl while we were playing. This girl was on all these drugs and just got on the stage and started fighting our guitarist and tried to strangle her with her guitar strap. People had been getting wasted for three days and not sleeping or eating anything other than magic mushrooms. One person was selling corn at one for 25 cents and three for a dollar. One guy did a backflip off a picnic table and landed on his head and then fell asleep under a truck’s tire. It was just the most extreme debauchery I have ever seen.”

Franz Schuller
(singer/guitarist, Grim Skunk)
“We used to take vacations on North Carolina’s outer banks to go surfing. We had really gotten into surfing and went there at the end of summer to surf hurricane waves. We’re okay surfers but storm waves can be really hairy. To get out there you have to fight these waves for 20 minutes and the waves were so big this time that I was just out of breath and had no more strength in my arms. When my wave came up I had to make a split-second decision to ride it out or let it flip me backwards. If I let it flip me down in the water I knew I might not come up because you are down there for 15 to 20 seconds anyway and I just didn’t have that much breath let alone the strength to make it to the surface. I went for it and the top of the wave pulled me back but I managed to get through and felt the waves crash by my toes. I was so freaked out after that I just stayed in the water for an hour instead of catching a wave back to shore. When I finally got back to shore I was just thanking God I made it out alive. I had to force myself to go in the water again the next day. This happens all the time with surfing - once a shark even swam by me.”

Chuck Comeau
(drummer, A Simple Plan)
“We had this bus driver recently who would fall asleep while driving us. We were all asleep and suddenly we were getting thrown out of our bunks and stuff was just flying all over the place. After that we had to stay up with him to keep him awake. Another thing we’re doing now is extreme sleep deprivation. We have been doing these shows for radio stations and have been taking red-eyes everywhere. Right now I’m in Hawaii and right after the show we’re flying somewhere else. This whole week we have been sleeping for about two or three hours a night and playing shows all over the globe, everyday.” :

At the Bell Centre on Sunday, Dec. 29, 5pm, $20-$25, all ages

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