>>> March 14, 2002
Soaring Prince Charlie

Something far more heinous than clear-cutting is about to strike the Amazon rainforest. The culprit, to be erected in the town square of Palmas, is a bronze statue of a heavily muscled figure clad in a loincloth. Large wings protrude from its back, and at its feet, a mass of sinners. An inscription declares this the “saviour of the world.” Yet this is no religious icon.

“It is Prince Charles,” explained Governor Jose Wilson Sequeira Campos, “saving the world.”

The work, commissioned to pay tribute to the Prince for bringing attention to global warming’s effects on the rainforests, is said to be a ringer for the future king—aside from the muscles, wings, full head of hair and small, pinned-back ears.

An official at St. James’s Palace said the prince was “chuffed to bits.” When asked if the prince actually owned a loincloth, the official said he believed so, though he’d never seen him in it. :

—Scott Saxon