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>>People Private dilemmas >>
Passion, porn and preemies are daily problems
by CHRIS BARRY
Age: Ageless
Occupation:
Sex therapist
Bio: This
Westmount dynamo has been helping Montrealers address their sexual difficulties
for over 25 years. Trained in the early 1970s by Masters and Johnson,
Tobi, who is a licensed psychotherapist, will, among other things, help
you to get that useless slab of flesh hanging between your thighs up
and running quicker than you can say “The Olson Twins.” Doubling
as a family therapist/marriage counsellor, Tobi says that “sex
has to be treated as a serious subject. But because people are very
shy about it, many couples unfortunately end up waiting too long before
seeing somebody about their problem.” Also unfortunately, her services
are not covered by Medicare.
Her estimate
as to how many couples have sexual difficulties: “Fifty per
cent of all couples have at least one person who is dissatisfied. That’s
a lot of people.”
Does she ever
recommend sex surrogates to her patients? No, because it is the
legal equivalent of pimping. “It would be great if I could because
it can be very hard doing sex therapy with single people—especially
with single people having difficulty finding a partner.”
A few of the
more common things people come to see her about: Premature ejaculation,
retarded ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, inability to achieve orgasm.
“But lack of sexual interest is probably the most common reason
why people come to see me.”
Has she witnessed
a decline in her male clientele since the advent of Viagra? Not
really. “I find that more and more people who use Viagra have been
coming for sex therapy because they don’t want to be dependent
on a drug.”
Does she ever
recommend that couples go to sex workshops and the kind of places they
like to show on HBO’s Real Sex, where groups of strangers gather,
get naked, and try to discover all the dirt on the majestic wonder of
their G-spots and prostates? No. “People with sex problems
are not generally interested in broadcasting their problems by going
to masturbation workshops and the like.”
One thing that
a lot of people are uncomfortable with: Oral sex.
Does she still,
in this day and age, get people coming to her looking to find a “cure”
for their homosexuality? Very, very rarely.
Does she feel
it is possible to rescue homosexuals from the godless immorality of
their perverted disgusting sexual orientation? No. “Not even
if we wanted to.”
Something she
considers to be a new and “huge” problem with respect to relationships:
Men “hooked” on Internet pornography.
What she does
for fun: Antiquing, going to the theatre and playing piano at sing-a-longs.
She also happens to be an ass-kicking ballroom dancer.
One organization
that she belongs to: The Westmount Lawn Bowling Club.
Musical preferences:
Gospel, folk, Nana Mouskouri, rock ’n’ roll.
Last book read:
Honeymoon in Purdah: An Iranian Journey, by Alison Wearing
A couple of
recent films she thought were fab: A Beautiful Mind, In the Bedroom.
Television preferences:
Tobi says she’s hooked on CNN—especially since the events
of 9-11.
Childhood ambition:
To own a summer camp.
Words of wisdom:
“You can make lemonade out of lemons, and it doesn’t always
have to be sour. People are capable of amazing things.” : |
Name:
Tobi Klein