>>> January 24, 2002
Real life rock

Rock talk: Whether you’re a denim jacket-toting, bong-hitting rocker or a nebbishy artsy intellectual who finds meaning in Menudo lyrics, this is the site for you. Rockwisdom.com is a repository of over 9,000 lyrical quotes from all threads of popular music on topics ranging from drugs to religion to love, and everything else. The quotes range, like the music itself, from the brilliant to the brain-dead, but hey, you’ll look incredibly well-versed (or like a huge nerd). Become an instant pop culture scholar at www.rockwisdom.com.

Cocksucker fart dickwad: Like your 13-year-old cousin who farts, burps and makes puking noises, Pornolize appeals to the immature, moronic jerk within. Revealed by Networthy operative Cynthia, Pornolize will convert “said Prime Minister Chrétien” to “said Prime Asslicker ‘Big Dick’ Chrétien.” Best of all, it works in five languages, including Danish and Hungarian. Farting superdick gangbang at www.pornolize.com. :

Michael Citrome