Fright nights

>> Saints and sinners, ghosts and goths, hobbits and hos, cannibals and candy: a rundown of Halloween's ghoulish gatherings

by LORRAINE CARPENTER

There's never rest for the wicked and it's right about that time, so dress the fuck up and get ready to party, y'all! For classic Halloween kicks, you know there's always the Rocky Horror Picture Show, at 9 p.m. and midnight on Friday, Oct. 26, and Saturday, Oct. 27, and at 9 p.m. only on the big night itself, Wednesday, Oct. 31. This year's ball features the lovely Plastik Patrik as MC, as well as the Mercy Killings live cast singing and throwing shit around on stage, plus costume contests, all for $10.95 (advance) or $12.95 (door). Oh yeah, and they're showing the film too, at the majestic Imperial Cinema.

For more laughs and screams, Nantha's Kitchen grants you Life After Death, a comedy, poetry and prose show hosted by Zombie Bob. He's a real zombie, you know, so don't pick at him. Other performers include Mathew Boylan, Scott Falconbridge, Catherine Kidd, Julie Mahfood, and Nantha himself, who's never not performing. That's on Wednesday, Oct. 31, at 8 p.m., $8 with a costume and $10 without.

Dress you up

I'm afraid a white sheet with eye-holes just won't cut it anymore. If you've got no costume at this late date, why not let these theme parties guide you? You can get medieval on yourself and don Middle Earth fashions for the Lord of the Rings Halloween Party at Diable Vert (4557 St-Denis) on Sunday, Oct. 28, 8 p.m., $6 in advance and $8 at the door. Just watch out for those pesky orcs.

Holy Jesus, Batman! Why not dress up as your favourite saint or biblical figure and swing by the All Hallow's Eve Dance, a non-profit event at St-James the Apostle Church (1439 Ste-Catherine W.). With an interactive floorshow plus pop and Christian sounds from DJ BoCon, this one promises to be just heavenly. At 7 p.m. on Friday, Oct. 26, $5 or $4 with holy-wear.

If your fave saints are Ste-Catherine and St-Laurent, however, you might prefer the Pimp and Ho Party at Le Swimming on Wednesday, Oct. 31. There's champagne and all kinds of alcohol for the best pimps and hos, as well as hardcore booze specials for everyone. It'll cost ya $5, bee-yatch! And if you get your hands on a flyer, you'll save 10 epr cent on costumes at Eva B. For more details, call the info line at 831-8448.

If you're too sexy for that party, strap on your sleaze-wear or fetish gear (obligatory) for Mascarade 2001 at Cream Night Club, with costume contests and DJ Dominik Bro on decks. That's Saturday, Oct. 27, 10 p.m. to 3 a.m., $10. And some advice for the wicked: don't go home with anyone who won't take their gimp mask off. You've been warned.

You may be a winner

Ever worn a kickass costume and kicked yourself later for not entering a contest? If you crave big prizes, set your sights on Drugstore (1366 Ste-Catherine E.) or Backtrack (the old Mississippi at 1592 Ste-Catherine E., now gay- and straight-friendly). Both parties take place on Saturday, Oct. 27 and offer $200 cash for first prize, $100 for second prize, and $50 for third. Drugstore needs you and your costume in the joint by 10 p.m. (prizes at 11 p.m.), and Backtrack spins '70s, '80s and '90s tunes all night.

Club Saphir, meanwhile, offers two floors of ghoulish goth-industrial and new wave, as well as a $300 Cruella gift certificate for best costume. Yes, if you win, every day can be Halloween. Second prize is $150 cash, third best gets a bottle of champagne. Dress to impress on Saturday, Oct. 27, 10 p.m., $6.

And Le Dogue won't be left out, boasting $500 in prizes, Halloween music and projected montages of classic horror films. Also on Saturday, Oct. 27, for a mere $5, this one claims it's the best Halloween party in town.

The South Shore's putting up some stiff competition with Blackout at Brossard's Glo Lounge (5840 Taschereau Blvd.), with DJ Milo's deep and classic house, as well as prizes for best costume, sexiest costume, and worst costume. There's hope for everyone! The bar is open for ladies before 11 p.m., and Smirnoff is $3 all night, so you can really black out, if that's your bag, on Friday, Oct. 26.

Or you get your Monster Ball in a twist with DJ Booggee at the Museum of Contemporary Art. The eighth annual event, on Saturday, Oct. 27, at 10 p.m., is a bit pricey at $45 advance or $60 at the door. But turn that frown upside down, the cover covers unlimited beer, wine and buffet, and the insano costume prizes include $500 phone packages, ski trips, CDs, movie passes and a frickin' sofa!

But what you really need is a good bleeding. Stigmata kicks in with DJ Beth at the Just For Laughs Museum on Saturday, Oct. 27, and there are cash prizes for best costumes. Once again, get your paws and hooves on the flyer and you can save 15 per cent at Costumes Joseph Ponton. This annual bloodbath costs $12 in advance, $15 at the door and $20 for crumb-bums with no costumes.

(G)raves

You've got huge dayglo pants and oversized beads, you? You'll have to choose between two mega-raves on Saturday, Oct. 27. There's Ray Junior's Gloom 4 at Centre du Plateau (2275 St-Joseph E.), featuring two rooms, two moods and DJs Chris Liebling, Uppercut, Mark Tyler, Chakra Khan, Indica and many more. Dance with the damned, 10 p.m. to noon Sunday for $35.

Or you could shake your bones to the tune of 514's Freaky at Sona, where they'll transform the main room into a frigid "tech-house lab" (with DJs Seb Fontaine, Max Graham, XL, and more) and the hip hop lounge into a fiery "biohazard room" (with DJs Jazzy Jeff, the Rock Steady Crew, Crowd and more). Meanwhile, Laflèche oversees sounds at the bar. Running from 11 p.m. to 2 p.m. Sunday, this one's $40.

And if you can't stop freakin', there's After Freaky at Cream Night Club on Sunday, Oct. 28, with resident DJs Scott Free, Eddy Jasmin, C Side and Dominik Bro, as well as guests Dominic B and Doc Slime. Rave it up in daylight from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m.

Creepy creatures, great and small

For more humble Halloween haunts, there's the All Hallow's edition of Razzmatazz on Saturday, Oct. 27, for your Britpop, new wave, electro and alternative needs. That's at Nantha's Kitchen with DJs Amyl Nitrate and Radiowhore. It's free, it starts at 10 p.m. and we've got costume prizes, so come rest or rattle your bones in the red lounge.

For another freebie on Saturday, Oct. 27, cut the carpet (ahem) at the new dyke bar Magnolia (1329 Ste-Catherine E.). These ladies offer costume prizes, house, hip hop and more.

The always frightening Foufounes has DJ Carbone on the devil's decks for Halloween 1, on Saturday, Oct. 27, with $1,000 in give-aways and $1 drink specials. That's at 9 p.m., for 10 bones.

If your brain needs a pounding, check out Foufounes on Tuesday, Oct. 30, where hard-core techno DJs Achtung, Mutante and Psycho Le Punk will make you Wish You Were Dead. Start seizing at 10 p.m., $5.

Or crawl into Café Chaos, Saturday, Oct. 27, for a Halloween party and benefit for Anti-Racist Action, with live bands Roketman, Eskniilo and Downshift, 9 p.m., $2. And stick around for Fat & Funky with DJ Attitude at 11:30 p.m., free.

Also at Chaos, trick and treat yourself to a free show on Wednesday, Oct. 31, featuring Itchy Bonbon and friends with Placard (9 p.m.), and Hell-oweenienne Night with the ever-fiendish DJ Belzébuth (the man with the devil horn hair) at 11:30 p.m.

And if you're still feeling devilish after-the-fact, la Sala Rossa hosts the third annual Buried Alive with goth/dark wave DJs Mr. Black and Uriel on Friday, Nov. 2, 10 p.m., $10.

Dead or live

You want music performed before your very eyes? How about live decapitations, fire eating, bloody puppets, tribal wrestling and monster music? That's what Foufounes has lined up for its Cannibal Halloween on Wednesday, Oct. 31, with "stage beast" Mononc' Serge and the first appearance by something they're calling Matamort. Start waking the dead at 8 p.m. for only $10.

Fouf also reaches the outer limits with the Collateral Damage Tour on Monday, Oct. 29, featuring pulp-powered, Lovecraftian astro-rockers the Darkest of the Hillside Thickets alongside the Real Mackenzies, Bazooko and Fabulous Disaster at 8 p.m., for $7.

Costumes are encouraged when funk fright-meisters Aliens beam down for Jello Bar's E.T. Halloween Party, which also features DJ Pierre Perpall Jr. That's Saturday, Oct. 27, my pretties.

Feel the chill at the Shiver Show with theatrical rappers EYE2EYE and DJs spinning R&B, reggae, dance and techno. Remember, dancing keeps the goosebumps away. That's Saturday, Oct. 27, at the Just For Laughs Studio, 10 p.m., $10 in advance and $13 at the door.

For bone-breaking beats, check out the Beatless album launch at Quartier Latin on Saturday, Oct. 27. DJ Alex Attias, half of the British DJ duo, will spin nu-jazz, breakbeats, soulful techno, deep house and more, alongside DJs Troubleman and Alex Robbins. This eerie event, which doubles as a Rotation Halloween party, starts at 9 p.m. and costs $6.

Tricks are for kids

We can't forget the children, can we? For francophone tots, Contes pour l'Halloween is a storytelling treat on Saturday and Sunday, Oct. 27-28, with Sylvi Belleau at the Imprévu room of the Esquisse Theatre (1650 Marie-Anne E.). Yarns are spun at 4:30 p.m. on both days and costs $4 for kiddies and a whole $5 for adults.

Goblins and creepy characters colour the Halloween Fest, Saturday, Oct. 27, at the Montreal School of Performing Arts (3480 Decarie, 2nd floor), 4-5:30 p.m., $5. Expect scary stories and sweet treats, and don't forget to bring the kids.