Gruel fuel

>> Kindly lunchlady serves hot, healthy meals to snotty punk kids

by CHRIS BARRY

Name: Claudia Rourke-Frew.

Age: 57

Occupation: Lunchlady/cafeteria manager.

Salary: $15 an hour.

Bio: This matronly yet downright delicious Roxboro resident has been making the two-hour bus and metro commute to her job at Royal Vale school in NDG for approximately 10 years now. Born in Côte-St-Paul, Claudia idolized the Everly Brothers and Connie Francis and as a teenager regularly wowed peers with her nifty dance steps at sockhops in neighbouring Pointe St-Charles. Dropping out of school in the late 1950s to become a rock 'n' roll hairdresser, Claudia, after temporarily being distracted in the '60s and '70s with the task of raising a family, re-entered the work force as a high school cafeteria worker in 1979.

Her culinary specialties: Shepherd's pie, spaghetti, chicken fajitas, tacos. "Sometimes I find this stuff just too dang hot but the kids just love it."

How much a chicken fajita meal goes for at the Royal Vale cafeteria: $3 with an entrée, vegetable, dessert and drink. Without an entrée: $1.80.

Do middle-aged cheapskates or homeless people ever dress up as high school students and come to her kitchen looking for $3.00 chicken fajita meals? No.

Something that will not be tolerated in the Royal Vale cafeteria: Profanity. "If I hear a student getting ready to say a bad word that begins with the letter 'f' I'll get in there and yell 'fudge' before they can say it. That goes for the 's' word as well."

Do kids ever try to spit or flick boogers into her mashed potatoes when her back is turned? "They can't because it's all enclosed. But we do get some smartypants who try to stick their fingers into the freshly baked cakes and muffins to make holes in them."

Best part of the job: Making friends with some of the children and watching them go from kindergarten to graduation.

Worst part of the job: Saying goodbye to the graduating class every year. "After all this time I still haven't been able to push myself to go to a grad. I just know I would cry. It would be too sad for me."

Has any kid with a nut allergy ever eaten her food and turned blue and started to flop around on the cafeteria floor like a fish out of water? No. "We do our best to stay away from nuts."

Do disturbed teenage boys ever try to flirt with her? "Oh yeah, there are a lot that do. But it's bugging flirting, they don't really mean it."

What she does on Monday nights: Throws strikes in her bowling league.

What she does on Wednesday nights: Practices with her vocal group, Simply Classics, who are a pretty big hit on the old-age home circuit. She also sings in the Roxboro United Church choir every Sunday.

Something else she is in to: Tai Chi.

Current ambition: To improve her mastery of sign language. "It's not as easy to learn as you think."

Literary preferences: Romance novels and Reader's Digest condensed books.

Favourite television shows: E.R., Touched by an Angel, Oprah, Hollywood Squares.

Words of wisdom: "Smile, God loves you. He ain't finished with you yet.":

Comments? dimwit@openface.ca