Weird mayoral candidates #2

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by Patrick Lejtenyi

Municipal politics being the circus that it is, Michel Bédard, head of the White Elephant Party of Montreal, thinks the city's ringleader supreme, Mayor Bourque, has been doing a great job with smoke and mirrors and making money vanish. But he happens to think Montrealers expect a bit more from their elected officials.

"The values and the principles of a party have to be supported by precise measures," he says. "And we have measures that are distinct, novel and extraordinary."

Bédard's program is remarkably lucid and profound for a fringe party. The White Elephant's 30-page policy paper contains positions on the important issues, but humour still runs throughout the party literature like a mantra. They offer the mainstream parties suggestions on how to lighten up and get the pickles out of their asses: hand out parking tickets in hospital waiting rooms, for instance, or an additional entertainment tax at drive-ins for cars with reclining seats and tinted windows. As an added recruiting incentive, the White Elephants will also hold a $1,000 draw for its candidates on Nov. 4, following the election, as a reward for all their hard work.

"It is possible we won't win," Bédard concedes, "so it is better if we take it all with a sense of humour. But just because we're funny it doesn't mean we aren't serious." The White Elephants are hoping their liberal use of jokes and puns in the upcoming campaign will attract the intelligentsia vote. Bédard estimates that to be around three or four per cent of the electorate.