Lorax attacks

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by Craig Segal

The Lifted Lorax is coming to town. You know, the Dr. Seuss character who "spoke for the trees"? The little fellow who yanked himself away into the sky by the seat of his pants 30 years ago after all his trees were chopped down to make useless "thneeds" for a greedy capitalist pig-dog world? Well, our puggish pal is flying in to lend a hand to his colourful environmental activist friends for a wacky protest against a big secretive conference.

Politicians from 34 western hemisphere countries will be here March 29-30 to discuss three topics with long titles at the "First-ever meeting of the ministers of the environment of the Americas." Environmentalists are miffed at the covert nature of the meeting. The public can't attend and journalists will be locked away in an "on-site media room," according to an Environment Canada press release.

The ministers' meeting falls three weeks before the Free Trade Area of the Americas blowout in Quebec City, April 20-22. Yet protesters say it's connected. "It's absolutely an FTAA event," says SOS Gaia rep Brian Sarwer-Foner. "It's one of the pre-FTAA meetings."

Besides the return of the Lorax, who will be the protest's official mascot, Sarwer-Foner is also promising a fun and peaceful protest full of drumming on empty water jugs, "people dressed as forests," as well as "pots, pans and kazoos!!!" Call 932-8715 for info.