Snow removable deemed unaxpectable

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by George Maddux

Sofoklis Rasoulis is back, taking on the concerns of Park-Ex in spite of a grievous spelling disability. The ever-entertaining 48-year resident of Park-Ex, who livened up city hall as an opposition councillor from 1982-89, came short in his last few bids to be re-elected to council. But the unstoppable Rassoulis is promising to try again this fall, and is gearing up by helping out future megacitizens of the North-End neighbourhood.

In a recent press release, Rasoulis addresses such neighbourhood problems as "snow removable," which he considers "unaxpectable," explaining that "the side walks have a lot of freezing slipping snow." He also believes that the local city "councellor" is "lieying to the people" in claiming that services have improved. Rasoulis, who now works as a shipping broker, has also heard "many complains" from local businesses about "sticker parking." He even has a small petition of local merchants who say the policy of reserving spots for residents has hurt business. Rasoulis blames Mayor Bourque for forcing businesses to go "slowly-slowly" into bankruptcy, and begs the mayor to "re-exam your decision in order to make the citizens happy," demanding a debate with the mayor over what he subtly describes as "THE MEGACITY--THE KILLER OF THE CITIZENS OF MONTREAL."

Beleaguered Park-Exers looking for an irrepressible firebrand to help with their grievances--or anybody with a dictionary to spare--can reach Rasoulis at 274-0668.