Ace in the hole

>> The art of sewage maintenance and repair

by CHRIS BARRY

 Name: Denis Heroux

 Age: 51

 Job title: Sewer worker

 Employer: City of Montreal

 Job description: Digging holes in concrete, repairing sewer and water lines, dealing with bitchy and waterless citizens.

 Current salary: $22 an hour

 Bio: This jovial Verdun resident first started crawling through Montreal sewer pipes back in 1988, abandoning his career as a self-employed electrician for the security that only life as a Montreal blue-collar worker could offer. Describing himself as a "natural born leader," Heroux says that if he hadn't chosen to spend his working life wading through fecal matter, he would have liked to have become either a painter or a priest. "Somebody who helps other people in their time of need." Rumoured to be an exceptionally talented artist, he continues to work with oil paints today. He says he enjoys the challenge of sewer work, and is proud of being among the "four or five per cent of the population with the guts and stomach to do the job."

 Most satisfying element of his work: Being able to restore water service to frustrated and gamey-smelling Montrealers.

 Most annoying part of his job: Dealing with people who are convinced he is part of a grand conspiracy to deny them water.

 Does he ever get claustrophobic? No. "This is not a job for someone who is claustrophobic. Sometimes you crawl on your stomach through pipes as small as two feet by three feet, which may stretch for an entire city block. It's very, very quiet down there and the only light is the one on your headlamp."

 Some things you run into while crawling through a sewage tunnel: Rats, shit, used condoms, old syringes, soggy toilet paper, urine.

 Biggest rat he has ever met: About the size of a large kitten--maybe a little bigger.

 Has he ever made friends with a rat while crawling through the sewer? Not really. "But occasionally when I've come face to face with a pair of beady little red eyes I've taken my finger and put it on the rat's nose--not really playing with him exactly, but kind of. It's a myth that rats will attack you."

 One hazard of the job: "When you are crawling through the pipes and somebody on the street flushes their toilet you can hear it. And if you're not paying attention to get out of the way when you hear the sound then you can get all splashed up with their sewage. But it's part of the job. You get to know the sound after a few splashes."

 Food for thought: "During a drought it is absolutely filthy and disgusting down there. But after a rainstorm it's so clean in some of the sewers that I would eat a sandwich in one of them. It actually smells good. Well, maybe not so good but it doesn't smell like shit at least."

 Something that really pisses him off: Journalists who portray City of Montreal blue-collar workers as lazy.

 Is the sewer a good place to burrow a hole and take a nap and not have to worry about media-types snapping your photo? No. "We never sleep down there."

 Hobbies: Chess, fishing, going to museums.

 Personal moral code: "Be honest and be open."