Angel >> Porn Despite the dire warnings so judiciously addressed in Canadian media of late (especially the Globe and Mail), we would like to remind our readers that pornography is not all bad. In an age when "there's so much porn on the Web that you couldn't get through it in a lifetime," employment opportunities at New Frontier Media and Time/Warner porn-related endeavours alone contribute significantly to the economy. Studies on criminal sex problems suggest that pornography could "provide a safety valve for antisocial impulses." Plus, without porn, how would sperm donation banks fill their coffers? And finally, how else would editors occupy their time when they're waiting for late copy?

Insect >> Pollution Few developed countries have become as complacent about pollution as Canada, as we watch our POPs drift north to poison unsuspecting communities who have troubles of their own. While nations throughout Europe have green parties actively participating in government, Canadians will have to put their faith in environment ministers who spend their happy hour clinking glasses with the ministers of trade and hope for the best.