Crimson tide

>> The princes of prog rock have learned to fly

by JOHNSON CUMMINS

Prog rock sucks!

Now that I have the attention of all the software designers and Dungeons & Dragons enthusiasts out there, they can disregard the rest of this article and start typing their hate e-mails this instant.

For the rest of you, I guess I should back up a bit and admit that not all prog rock sucks. I just can't resist poking fun at its lumpen, myopic, mulleted, chronic-masturbating fanbase. The fact is, though, that the majority of prog rock comes across as mere musical meandering, replete with self-indulgences and dizzying displays of musical pyrotechnics.

Being some of prog rock's originators, the members of King Crimson were tackling uncharted musical waters when bands like Genesis were still trying to figure out the chords to "Louie Louie." Every new record finds them taking their music to yet another level, "progressing" in the right sense of the word. In fact, their new record The Construction of Light is one of the best they've done since 1981's Discipline, and with songs like "Prozac Blues" and "Into the Frying Pan" they manage not to alienate but rather reinvent the genre they helped foster.

"With this category 'prog,' I can see why King Crimson could be considered a part of that," admits drummer Pat Mastelotto, "but a lot of these bands who also claim to be prog rock make me think that the title is really misleading, because they're calling themselves progressive, but they sound like it's still 1973."

If you don't instantly recognize Mastelotto's name you may know him as the man behind the traps for XTC and numerous others before recently joining King Crimson. Two of the more (ahem) interesting points on his drumming resume are a stint with hair farmers Mister Mister, best known for their lap-dancer anthem "Broken Wings," and the Rembrandts, best known for the horrible, saccharine-enriched ditty "I'll Be There For You," from the TV show Friends

"People don't really ask me about the Rembrandts too much," he says, "but for some reason I still get people coming up to me and asking me about 'Broken Wings.'"

At Metropolis tonight, Thursday, Nov. 23, 8pm, $37.82