The anti-bacterial truth by SCOTT C Yes, I am alive. Those of you with keen senses will have noticed that I was missing in action for the second week of September. Now, I'm not usually one to go and spill all of my business into the street, but the circumstances of my disappearance were insane. There I was, laid up in the hospital with a bacterial infection (not flesh-eating bacteria, for you knucklehead broken-telephone types) of unknown origin that walked up and knocked out my system. Put it this way: for a guy who'd never seen the inside of a hospital, I paid my dues. An I.V. in each arm for the week, an early-morning surprise spinal tap, an archaic and painful bone-marrow biopsy, vascular and abdominal ultrasounds, an echocardiogram and about 14 specialists all baffled by my condition. But, as you may have already guessed, everything's fine. My greatest thanks go out to everybody who came to visit, called or e-mailed. Extra special thanks goes out to my good friend Sharon Labao, who not only stayed with me in emergency for nine hours while I was battling a fever of 105, but made sure I had clean underwear for my incapacitated ass.    Well, Rootdown Wednesdays at Tokyo may have had Brighton's Russ Dewbury in town to play on Sept. 6, but the official launch party is going down on Wednesday, Sept. 27. Resident and head dude Alex Robbins, Esq. will be joined by the likes of Gary Tremblay, b.k.a. Troubleman, and myself for a night of nu-jazz, dancefloor jazz and funk and soul.    Oh, my goodness! A straight-up hip hop night right on the Main! That's right, Triple Threat Thursdays has surfaced at Sugar on St-Laurent and seems to have the blessing of the people. Montreal hip hop celebrity and recluse DJ Snake Eyes has come out of hibernation to take the wheel of this operation with his buddy Spazmodik manning the controls. Nice flyer, guys.  Luba Lounge steps in with its contribution to the hip hop cause with Golden Mic Sundays. I know that Wednesday nights used to end with a makeshift passing of the microphone, but this night seems to have lent the entire evening to the MC. We'll see.  The infamous KOPS crew presents the Rhythm Mercenaries in concert with everybody's favourite mic-slobbering mechanics Shadowboxers at Cafe Campus on Thursday, Sept. 21. The beatboxers and the band will be joined by guest DJs Jaber, Maysr and Naes. Show starts at 9 p.m. and the tax is $6.    Lastly, local luminaries Heavyweight Productions continue to bloom and grow into really cool art snobs with the release of their limited edition catalogue on sale exclusively at Noize. The little book contains all of the pieces you loved during the Jazz Fest, and maybe some you haven't seen yet, as well as a musical treat tucked in the back cover. The going rate is $20 plus tax or $20 (U.S.) plus shipping and handling on the Net. : To all the girls at Ten Med: plan_b13@hotmail.com Nancy, where are you? plan_b13@hotmail.com