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>>> September 7, 2000
Christians and robots Blasphemy: Billing itself as a "Christian Analysis of American Culture," ChildCare Action Project is one of the strangest unironic things on the Web. CAP reviews movies--not for their quality, but for their content, taken out of context and analyzed on a grid. Categories include "Sex/Homosexuality" and "Offence to God," and a favourite CAP complaint is about excessive displays of flatulence in kids' movies. Other critiques tinge on racism, such as mentioning a movie's display of a yin yang symbol as an offence to God. Of course, the CAP critic walked out in disgust halfway through American Pie. Something about baked goods. Be cautioned at www.capalert.com. RoboBall: This year's Robocup is over, and results are available on the official Web site at www.robocup2000.org. The world's most important robotic soccer competition, Robocup 2000 featured an all-Aibo league, with a team from our own McGill University. That's right, teams of Sony robotic dogs facing off on the football pitch. Oi! Michael Citrome |
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>>> August 31, 2000
Bitter critic I hate movies: Sure, the Web is a great soapbox for kooks who like to bash things we hold in high esteem in our society, but usually they have some other agenda--promoting weird religious beliefs or eugenics or something. Not so for The Filthy Critic. This guy hates everything. Give him a movie and he'll describe it in the vilest terms imaginable. He calls The Matrix "a Piers Anthony novel come to life." His review of Dogma includes "Blah, blah, fuck, blah, fuck, blah. Look at me: I just wrote a Kevin Smith movie." He threatens Rob Schneider's life for what he refers to as "Deuce Bigalow: Retarded Fucking Gigolo." Spread the anger at www.bigempire.com/filthy/. Circus time! Monkey bikes are tiny trail motorcycles from the '60s that make the rider resemble a monkey on a tricycle. There's no way to rationally discuss these weird little creations, so just check them out www.geocities.com/MotorCity/Track/7581/. This may be the next summer's big trend--or it may not. Michael Citrome |
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>>> August 24, 2000
Hello lamppost Mmmm.. peculiar: From the mind of Paul Lukas, creator of the brilliant and classic consumer culture zine Beer Frame, comes Inconspicuous Consumption, a Web site documenting some of the stranger products to be found on store shelves. Featuring in-depth investigations of such esoterica as a can opener that hasn't changed its design in 44 years, and very specialized types of screws apparently designed by someone with a twisted sense of humour, Insconspicuous Consumption holds a mirror up to the culture of consumerism. Except this mirror is held slightly askew. At www.core77.com/inconspicuous. Simon sez: From the local-boy-does-good department comes Lasers in the Jungle, the Web's leading Paul Simon fansite. Maintained by a local Simonophile, this site is a fan (and stalker's) dream, with exclusive and detailed information all about everyone's favourite half of Simon and Garfunkel. You'll find a complete discography, multimedia, an extensive archive of lyrics and chords and even some very Paul-Simon-specific humour. http://paul.simon.org and I'm feeling groovy. Michael Citrome |
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>>> August 17, 2000
SPLAT! Drop it: Although their moniker conjures up images of buff British paratroopers, the Drop Squad are actually a group of students from Rensselaer Polytechnic in Troy, New York. On one fateful day in 1992, they decided to form a secret society whose main exploit would be dropping various things from various heights and documenting it on film. The resulting displays of gravity and tangles with campus security can now be found at www.dropsquad.com. No question, this collection of images and text goes a long way towards conclusively illustrating that tennis balls, typewriters and McDonald's hamburgers are no match for Newton's third law. Post-MP3: Contrary to commonly held belief, it's possible to pirate music without the aid of a computer and an MP3 player. The well-researched Web site (www.osopinion.com/Opinions/Wes/Wes2.html) explains how anyone can illegally copy music with the help of an ordinary household radio receiver and tape deck. Shocking! Just wait until the RIAA hears about this. Michael Citrome |
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>>> August 10, 2000
Beer and Jesus Thirsty? If you're at all a typical Montrealer, much of your warm-weather thoughts are probably devoted to imbibing cold beverages, most likely of the barley and hops variety. But have you ever considered the myriad cold liquids that have passed through the parched lips of the populace? Did you know that it was Cliquot Club, an Eskimo-themed ginger ale, that introduced the first soda can? Or that during WWII, the U.S. Army sent camouflage beer cans to lubricate the troops at the front? For all this and more, take a virtual tour of the Beverage Container Museum at www.gono.com/vir-mus. Go fish: Not from the creators of popular Web-portal Ask Jeeves, comes Ask Jesus, a site where the son of God will personally search the Web for you and deliver the results using His eternal wisdom. Actually, the results are more smartass than divine, but only a papist would be offended by the Jesusifier, which translates any Web page into something... well... biblical, accompanied by a snappy midi soundtrack. Yea verily.www.askjesus.org. Michael Citrome |
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>>> August 3, 2000
I'm ready for my close-up Popularity contest:Do you think you have a beautiful face? Should you be modelling self-adhesive moustaches in magazine ads, if such a product existed? Are you a shameless attention-seeker who can only get ego-gratification by having many people compliment you? If so, run, don't walk to RateMyFace ( www.ratemyface.com ), where thousands of people's faces are on display. Constant voting determines who is most beautiful and cruel comments make the lower-ranked feel worthless. Putting your photo online is free and anyone can vote and post comments. For a slightly less subtle take on the same phenomenon, check out Rate My Picture ( www.ratemypicture.com ), which should probably have been called ratemytits.com--no nudity, but we all know what's going on here. Ramenation:uMunch.com delivers Asian snack food to your door from their Web site at www.umunch.com. They have everything from coconut jelly to squid jerky, easily accessible through a user-friendly interface. There's also western snack foods and chocolate. With this much variety available, this site could easily turn into an obsession. : Michael Citrome |
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>>> July, 27 2000
Sphere hilarity Pop!:As seen on the Comedy Network and fresh from their appearance at Just for Laughs, the Balloonheads are also the stars of their own Web site at www.balloonheads.com. This site has video clips of all the Balloonhead episodes. Set in an Italian-narrated world populated with balloon-headed celebrities and creatures that exist solely to pop them in order to kill them, Balloonheads is one of those things you don't soon forget. Especially recommended is Episode 12, featuring Alfa and Romeo, the Italian superheros, and their enemies, the Boys in the Hoods, the KKK boy band. Game sounds II:Hot on the heels of metalcore video-game musicians the Minibosses, DJ Pretzel is serving up a hot order of classic video-game themes, remixed in techno, drum & bass, jungle and hip hop styles. Massive breakbeats and twiddly NES sounds will leave you nostalgic for the days of Super Mario Bros. and Young MC. Check it at http://remix.overclocked.org. : Michael Citrome |
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>>> July, 20 2000
Tone Loc Rockin' the ringer: At one time, mobile phones just rang, bleeped or chirped. Nowadays, everyone carrying a Nokia is blasting electronic symphonies at anyone in the general area. The result is that nobody's quite sure whose phone is the one ringing, and a sudden burst of electronic tones will send a crowd scrambling for their pockets. Realizing this, some smart minds got together and created a site called YourMobile: www.yourmobile. com that lets anyone with a PCS phone on a compatible network choose from hundreds of ring tones and have the tones sent to their phone, for free. We're not talking about nursery rhyme rings here either: there are hundreds of songs from the '50s to today, including tracks from the Smiths and Dr. Dre. Once you select your rings, the Web site will send a message to your phone with the tone included. Just press a button to accept, and it's saved in your phone. The site has a comprehensive listing of compatible phones, and even if you can't receive tones on yours, there are instructions on how to enter the new tones manually. : Michael Citrome |