Working up a lather

>> >> Have the Dwarves really cleaned up their act?

by JOHNSON CUMMINS

The press package for the Dwarves is about as thick as War and Peace and reads like Fatty Arbuckle's diaries, littered with references to jailbait princesses, orthodontia fetishes, fighting audience members, senseless destruction and numerous other obscenities that come along with being the kings of delinquent behaviour. From their trademark 20-minute sets riddled with as much violence as the average Manchester football match to their token backstage depravity, the Dwarves were the real deal. The MC5 may have preached "dope, guns and fucking in the streets," but the Dwarves were the only band to act on the motto and live to tell about it. In a nutshell, they ain't 'N Sync.

However, with the new, aptly-titled Come Clean, it seems that the Dwarves may have finally turned over a new leaf and become the Pat Boones of punk. Hi-fi production replaces the barrage of noise of yesteryear and tunes like "How It's Done" are as catchy as the clap. Even the cover art is a tasteful take-off on their Blood, Guts and Pussy album sleeve, with models and a dwarf slathered in soap suds instead of blood. In previous interviews, Dwarves singer Blag Dahlia was right at home spinning yarns of depravity and decadence, but when I talk to him he comes across as a beauty pageant contestant telling the jury her plans for world peace. When I ask him about their notorious 20-minute sets he volleys back that they now play for three hours and 40 minutes--"just like Springsteen."

After some gentle prodding to get a quote based in truth, Dahlia isn't biting and insists we move the questioning along. When we clumsily dance through the violence question, Dahlia once again proves to be a slippery eel, until he grudgingly admits, "In the older days it would happen if we felt frustrated. Mostly it was incited by other people. We've had stabbings, and a promoter in Rochester held a gun to my head." Before giving up too much, Dahlia is quick to offer up a disclaimer: "Now we've built up a following and people come and have a good time. People should come to a Dwarves show expecting to see my fucking band and if they have some violence, I really don't care."

Upon closer inspection of the Come Clean CD, you may notice that the Dwarves still have a heaping helping of delinquency lurking behind the lush production and poppy veneer. Take the telling "I Want You To Die" or "Act Like You Know," wherein Dahlia screams from the punk pulpit, "Let's have some violence!" The skeletons in the Dwarves' closet really start rattling on a phone message tucked between tracks. A girl phones Dahlia to tell him "Next time you're in town you better give me a real fucking," and ends with "Today is my birthday, I just turned 14." When I ask Dahlia if this soundbite was fabricated or real, he finally does come clean for the first time in our interview. "Of course it's real. Blag Dahlia is a fucking pimp and a rock legend and anybody who doesn't like it can just suck my dick." :

With Dropkick Murphys, Bouncing Souls and Vision at Rainbow-Ites on Tuesday, June 27, 8pm, $15