Best of Montreal 2000

>> BOMontrealers

Chow Time


Montrealer closest to sainthood

1. Father Emmett Johns (Pops)

2. Felipe Alou

3. Leonard Cohen

4. Father Warren

5. Mafiaboy

Father Emmett is not new to this category, and his good work continues. However, the notable sea change is the inclusion of Mafiaboy. Mirror readers, like a growing body of international pundits, feel that Mafiaboy's actions weren't so much criminal as simply a successful exposé of the holes in so many corporate Web sites.

Honourable Mentions: 165 bus driver who decorates his bus * Adrian Bercovici * Alain Vignault * Cardinal Turcotte * Celine Dion * Charles Bronfman * Charlie Biddle * Claire Thiboutot (founder of STELLA) * Dom Castelli * Howard Galganov * Jean Leloup * Jeffrey Loria * Louis Cyr: strong, dead, already has statue * Marc Boris St. Maurice * Matt Collyer * Melissa Auf der Maur * Mordecai Richler * Nick Auf der Maur * Paul Gott * Phyllis Lambert * Pierre Trudeau * Sasha * Sid Stevens * Soeur Angèle * Vladimir Guerrero * Yeah right, we're all sinners



Montrealer closest to hell

1. Pierre Bourque

2. Louise Beaudoin

3. Claude Brochu

4. Lucien Bouchard

5. Elizabeth Bromstein

6. Réjean Houle

Isn't it funny how politicians always seem to do so very well--or not so well, rather--in this category?

Honourable mentions: 514 Productions * Abusive cops * Bloodshot Bill * Brian Mulroney * Celine Dion * DJ Rob Brown * Gilles Proulx (CKAC) * Jacques Parizeau * Jean Chrétien * Jean Doré * Jojo * Jordan Swift * Josée Legault * Lara Fabien * Leonard Cohen * Mafiaboy * Mario Tremblay * Melissa Auf de Maur * Mom Boucher * Montreal Mirror staff * Mordecai Richler * My landlord * Nantha Kumar, but he's enjoying himself * Overpaid STCUM employees * Patrick Roy * Paul Desmarais * Pierre Boivin * Pie-throwing clowns * Politicians! * Terry Dimonte * That guy who spray-paints VC * William Shatner



Most desirable man

1. David Usher

2. Rufus Wainright

3. James DiSalvio

4. Leslie Roberts

5. Neil Drabkin

6. Jordan Swift

Moist's David Usher has ruled this category for some time. Rising through the list is Queen Wainwright, or La Rufus, whose royal attitude has managed to cull more than a few lusty fans.

Honourable mentions: Aldo from Ciné-Café * Anyone who bathes and shaves * Basketball athletes * Blonde dreaded hippie BEDO model * Carlos Correal * Claude Rajotte * Corey Haim * Dan Miller * Dave Cooper * Dermod Travis * Invisible Christ on the Mount Royal cross * Jean-Luc Brassard * John "JB" Britton * Johnny Casino * Johnny Jackoff from the Vaginal Croutons * Leonard Cohen * Liam Callaghan * Luc Plamondon * Plume * Quan * Rico Cocono * Robert Libman * Robert Vézina * The hottie busboy at Buona Notte * The one in my bed * Travis Geko * Vladimir Guerrero * Wayne from Tonic * William Shatner * Xavier from Caféine * Youppi



Most desirable woman

1. Melissa Auf der Maur

2. Mitsou

3. Sasha

4. Heather Hiscox

5. Patty Kim

6. Paulina Abarca

Montreal women rule! Just look at the cool chicks who dominate this category, from the talented thespian Abarca to chanteuses like Mitsou and Melissa Auf der Maur. Hiscox, meanwhile, is newsworthy while Patty Kim is weathering things well. The Mirror's own Sasha continues to turn everyone on with those lurid columns of hers.

Honourable mentions: Aimée from Bloodsisters * All the snobby, dark-haired women at the Italian restos on the Main * Any waitress at Jello * Bete (from Bete & Stef) * Caroline Neron (DIVA) * Christine Rigby * Curling athletes * Elizabeth Bromstein * Elsie Martins * Geneviève Borne * Jacinthe * Jacklyn Jet * Josey Vogels * Lady Rita * Laila the bartender at Cafeteria * Lara Fabien * Lee-Lee L'Amour * Macha Grenon * Patricia Rodriguez * Plastic Patrik * Samantha from Tonic * Sophie Young from Modern Stories * The girls who work at Mosquito * Veronique Cloutier * Waitresses at Bily Kun * Yo Mama



Best politician

1. Michel Prescott

2. Jean Charest

3. Mario Dumont

4. Helen Fotopoulos

Honourable mentions: Alfonso Gagliano * Boris from Bloc Pot * Bourque * Chretien * Claude Rajotte * Elias Hondronicolas * François Legault * Gerry Weiner * Gilles Duceppe * Jean Chrétien * Louise Harel * Lucien Bouchard * Marvin Rotrand * Paul Martin * Peter Yeomans * Robert Libman * Russ Williams * Russel Copeman * Saulie Zaidel * William Johnson



Loudest activist

1. Howard Galganov

2. Jaggi Singh

3. Brent Tyler

4. ARA/Entartistes/Bloodsisters

5. Tommy Schnurmacher

Honourable mentions: Alexander Popovic * All middle-class hippies * Boris from Bloc Pot * Brent Tyler * CFS-Québec * Citizens of Centre-Sud * Jake Brown * Jim Duff at the Suburban * Office de la langue française * William Johnson * Yves Martineau



Replacement mayor

1. Felipe Alou

2. Michel Prescott

3. Youppi

4. Guy Lafleur

5. Philip Preville

Honourable mentions: A potato * Alain Vigneault * Anyone at this point * Claude Rajotte * Denys Arcand * Elvis Gratton * Finn from Men o' Steel * Gerry Weiner * Gord Sinclair * Helen Fotopolous * Howard Galganov * Jacques Duchesneau * John Jordan * Mario Dumont * Marvin Rotrand * Peter Trent * Rael * Rob Greene (CSU Pres.) * Robert Libman * Saulie Zajdel * Serge Savard * The horses that draw the calèches in Old Montreal * Vaginal Croutons



Best-dressed montrealer

1. David Usher

2. Leslie Roberts

3. Macha Grenon

4. Pierre Trudeau

A white-hot competition, considering what a decked-out bunch of people Montrealers are. Trudeau's inclusion seems a bit mysterious, seeing as public sightings of the former prime minister are rare at best.

Honourable mentions: Al Hood * Alain Vigneault * Anyone at the Bifteck * Bruni Surin * Claude Rajotte * Elsie Martins * Employees at Cours Mont-Royal * Erin Selby * Joe Schwarz * Joffrey * Jordan Swift * Julie Snyder * Keith Randall * Lee-Lee L'Amour * Marie Plourde * Mila Mulroney * Mitsou * Mitsumi Takahashi * People at Zara * Robbie Dillon * Roy Dupuis * Rufus Wainwright * Sase One * Squeegie punks * Strippers at Wanda's * Tom Watt from Buena Notte * Travis Geko * Wannabe models on St-Laurent



Best weirdo

1. Ogilvy spoonman

2. Harmonica Lady

3. Willem Bagchus

4. Stilts Man

5. Accordian guy

6. Norman Nawrocki

Honourable mentions: 3-wheeled biker guy * All who reelected Bourque * Anyone high on Berri mesc * Balloon & saw man in the metro * Bourque * Bruno Blanchet * Dancing guy from BSL * Danger Boy * Diaper man * Edwin of Edwin and the Bedouins * Gary from Barfly * Gavin McInnes * Great Antonio * Guru of all gods * Guy in front of Metro grocery on Queen-Mary * Jean Leloup * Jojo Savard * John Talbot * Les "The Penman" Pinsky * Murray Lightburn from the Dears * Nicole from the Sky * Noah Kole * P.J. Kennedy * Pierre Page (CKMF) * Plastic bag-wearing bum * Religious guy at Phillips Square * Richard with antennas on his head and diapers * Ricky Cyr * Rufus Wainwright * Santosh * Screaming guy (St-Marc & Ste-Catherine) * The Avenger of the Apocalypse * The big fat guy with the photos in the metro * The guy who gives everyone the finger * The guy with the shakers who sometimes comes to Cybertek * The Krishna gang * The lady who plays clarinet on the corner of Peel and Ste-Catherine * The naked bum downtown * The screaming man on Cote-des-Neiges



Best sports personality

1. Vladimir Guerrero

2. Felipe Alou

3. Bruni Surin

4. Dave Van Horne

5. Shayne Corson

Honourable mentions: Al Bishop * Alain Vigneault * Brian Wilde * Davey Hilton * Dick Irving * Elliot Price * Geneviève Janson * Herk Kivelos * Jacques Villeneuve * Jean-Luc Brassard * Jeff Hackett * Jeffrey Loria * Jim Beattie * José Theodore * Mats Sundin * Mitch Melnick * Pat Caporelli * Patrice Brisebois * Pierre Mcguire * Randy Tieman * Robert Wetenhall * Ron Reusch * Rondell White * Sensai Ron Philpott * Stephan Ouelette * Ted Bird * Ted Blackman * Tracy Ham * Ugueth Urbina



Best local news cast

1. Pulse

2. Newswatch

3. Global

Honourable mentions: 940 News * Citybeat * La Fin du Monde est à 7h * Montréal Ce Soir * Radio Noon



Best talking head

1. Dennis Trudeau

2. Heather Hiscox

3. Mitsumi Takahashi

4. Patty Kim

5. Leslie Roberts

6. Bynon

7. Bill Hoagland

Honourable mentions: Claude Rajotte * David Byrne * Doug Camilli * Hubert Bauch * John Moore * Kathy Rigby * Lauren Schwartz * Robert Vairo



Best radio show

1. Aaron & Tasso (Q92) /

Brave New Waves (CBC)

2. André & Nat (Mix 96)

3. Rage (CHOM)

4. Folk Roots (CKUT)

Honourable mentions: '80s lunch on the BUZZ * CJAD morning show * CKUT Wednesday nights 2-5 a.m. * Dave Van Horne's Internet ballgame * Daybreak * Definitely Not the Opera * Dr. Laura * Dykes on Mykes * La Grande demarche * Le Grimoire du métale * Le Marathon de l'amour * Les Refrains d'abord * Lion's Den * Ricky Cyr * Steve & Andrew on CHOM * Supper With Satan * Themepark U.K. * Vermont Public Radio evening jazz program



Best radio host

1. Claude Rajotte (CHOM)

2. Aaron & Tasso (Q92)

3. Ted Tevan (CFMB)

4. Peter Anthony Holder (CJAD)

5. Patti Schmidt (CBC's Brave New Waves)

6. Anne Lagacé-Dowsen (CBC)

Honourable mentions: Al Randall (CFQR) * Allen Mendelsohn (CKUT)* Anyone but MC Mario * Dave Van Horne * DJ John (CISM) * John Dee (K103.7) * Laurent Cadieux (CIBL) * Le Marathon de L'Amour (CISM) host * Lori Edmonds of Aaack on CKUT * Mike Regenstreif (CKUT) * Pete Marier (CHOM) * Pierre McGuire (CJAD) * Ricky Cyr (CJAD) * Sexxxy Eddy from Supper with Satan * Ted Bird (CJAD) * Terry DiMonte (CJAD) * Tommy Schnurmacher (CJAD) * Too Tall (CHOM) *



Elizabeth Bromstein cries in her pajamas!

There are some things that universally qualify as tacky: bleached-blonde tanning salon victims, anything acid-wash, fluorescent spandex, combining stripes and plaid... It's easy to attack queen of pop Celine and astrology priss Jojo. Their auras of tackiness are flagrantly public and specifically tailored to this province's supermarket checkout tabloids.

So what's Elizabeth Bromstein, a young anglo Gazette columnist and Musiqueplus VJ doing alongside these two primping poodle-like divas?

"It's not completely unwarranted--I am an asshole," she says. "I'm loud and obnoxious. Ever since I was a kid I've bred resentment. I can be bombastic and caustic, but tacky? Tacky is, like, fluorescent socks." Bromstein is shedding some light on her newly voted status of second tackiest personality in Montreal. "Who's number one? Jojo? It's an honour to be next to her! I used to watch her every Friday night at midnight, right before The X Files. Jojo's dog and my dog hate each other. They got in a fight once on Prince Arthur."

She admits that one can't help but take public criticism to heart some times. "People think that once you're in the public eye, you spend your fabulous life drinking cocktails," she says. "They can't imagine you at home in your pajamas crying. I don't make enough money to be sandwiched between Celine and Jojo! I can't help but take it a little personally."

But doesn't she see the humour and strange honour in such a silly nomination? "Yeah, well, the Mirror's readership is a bunch of pathetic plebs and thank god they have me to hate!" *
-- Genevieve Paiement