|
Doom and groom >> Chris O'Donnell flees brides-to-be in The Bachelor
by JOANNE LATIMER
In a hilarious voice-over, Jimmie (O'Donnell) explains how men secretly think of themselves as wild beasts who are genetically wired to resist becoming husbands. We hear all this over footage of horses stampeding across the grasslands of the Midwest. He calls this condition "Mustanghood."
We cut to Jimmie's thoughts on wedding ceremonies, as all the bachelor guests fall into a flop sweat when the bouquet is tossed toward their girlfriends. The stakes are high, we learn, when lovers casually say the word "future" and when men finally consent to the marriage trap. It's all very funny, with great visual fantasies about bachelors being lassoed like horses. British director Gary Sinyor is at his best when satirizing the essential male condition.
Despite his black-hearted monologue, Jimmie's really a mush. He has a wonderful girlfriend, Ann (Renee Zellweger), whom he almost wants to marry. So what, exactly, is the real problem? Well, Ann knows Jimmie isn't ready for marriage. So, following the trajectory of most love stories, Jimmie has the girl, loses the girl, loses his ex-girls, gets thousands of brides, loses them, then gets the original fiancee.
A crew of old men act as Jimmie's friends and advisors. There's Ed Asner as his grandfather's lawyer, there's James Cromwell as the wise priest and Hal Holbrook is the aged bachelor who understands Jimmie's bind. Marco (Artie Lange), Jimmie's best friend, helps things along and eventually we get a decent, working proposal out of the young groom. But we knew it would all work out because Ann wasn't nearly angry enough over Jimmie's botched proposals. Also, let's not forget that there's a considerable fortune forcing the issue.
The publicity trailers show Jimmie being chased by a herd of brides through the hilly streets of San Francisco. This spectacular shot is worth the price of admission, but don't miss an aristocratic Brooke Shields accepting Jimmie's proposal to line her family's coffers. :
The Bachelor opens Friday, Nov. 5 |
Jimmie Shannon has the cold sweats. He can only inherit his grandfather's fortune if he marries by 6:05 p.m. on his 30th birthday. That day is less than 24 hours away. Gulp. Thus we have the set-up for The Bachelor, starring Chris O'Donnell. Actually, we have the remake of the 1925 Buster Keaton film called Seven Chances. Funnily enough, the material still stands. Matrimonial jitters is timeless stuff.