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Out and about in L.A. >> Marga Gomez is a jaywalker by AMY BARRATT
Mirror: You've written four theatrical monologues and your itinerary sometimes has you performing different pieces from week to week. Doesn't it get confusing? Marga Gomez: The only thing I find confusing is dating two people. I have a bad memory for things like where I'm playing next, but I have a great photographic memory. All my shows are right there in my head. M: You don't even need to rehearse? MG: I might look it over that morning, but that's it. It's my only skill. I'm kind of like Rain Man. (Doing the voice) "I'm an excellent driver." Actually, I can't drive. I've tried and tried. When I went to L.A. I realized I was never gonna make it unless I could drive and become a blonde. I didn't go blonde, but I did take driver's ed. But the teacher was this creepy step-dad type. Every lesson was harassment and him telling me his ideas for screenplays. I need a driver's ed teacher who's a foxy chick with an accent. Then I could learn to drive. M: jaywalker is about literally pounding the pavement, looking for work? MG: The protagonist of the show is based on me, but she has this extreme optimism and belief in Hollywood. She believes that if you play by the rules, everything will happen. She prays to John Tesh for a sport utility vehicle and the ability to drive it. Did you know John Tesh got a star on the Walk of Fame? I was living in a hotel two blocks away and I saw the whole ceremony, and I thought to myself, "anything is possible." M: I hear you have a few choice words to say about Whitney Houston. MG: It's just that, in L.A., everybody is so femme... In the show, the character goes to the lesbian discotheque in L.A. and gets thrown out for not having a pedicure. I went to the dyke march in L.A. and I was the dyke. Because you can't tell by looking, all you have to go by is rumours. I used to ask the audience at every show, "How many people believe Whitney Houston is gay?" And there'd always be half of the audience who really sincerely believed this. And my feeling is, if she was a lesbian, she'd be the stupidest lesbian alive. Because she's married to this horrible man. If you want to get married to convince people you're not gay, you could marry Richard Simmons. You don't have to marry this mean scary guy that's gonna cut you. You don't see Jodie Foster marrying Hulk Hogan. I really hope Whitney doesn't turn out to be a lesbian, because she would lower the curve.
Marga Gomez, at MAI, Thursday, July 22, 7pm, Saturday, July 24, 9:30pm and Sunday, July 25, 3pm, $10+t/s |
Following up her theatrical monologue Memory Tricks and an appearance at Queer Comics two years ago, Marga Gomez is set to dazzle comedy fest audiences once again with her one-woman show, jaywalker. Part of this year's Just for Laughs Fringe series, the show is a "fictionalized" account of two years spent in L.A. trying to break into the movie business. Now back in her native New York, she shares her thoughts on L.A. dykes, driver's ed and John Tesh.