You got beef?! by SCOTT C Writing this column is going to get me killed. I know it sounds foolish, but I'm beginning to believe and consider the risks. Probably the biggest threat comes from my editors who are surely plotting my death right now, while drinking Coronas on a terrasse somewhere. Another involves all the people who occasionally disagree with some of my more inexcusable and inflammatory comments about DMX, Master P or whoever. It appears that roughnecks do read the paper, but do not share my disdain for wack hip hop. I'm always ready to defend against a sound tongue-lashing, but the threat of bodily harm has the power to make me run very quickly in the other direction. So please, if you don't like something I wrote, or on the off chance that you did, don't try to step to me physically 'cause I'm not havin' it! Call the Rant Line or e-mail me (plan_b13@hotmail.com) and we'll handle things proper-like. Well, me and the boys from Brass Knuckles have packed up our Wednesday night caravan to make room for Alchemy at Jai Bar. Taking the reins will be none other than Hundred Acre Wood featuring the lovely and talented Alex Robbins (yeah!). Spinning a delectable mix of down-tempo and worldbeat rhythms, you'll probably be impressed with AR's musical tastes if you check it out. Also new to Wednesday nights is El Segundo, a very clever move on the part of the Butta Babies from CKUT's Ill Groove Garden. The popular radio show that plays underground hip hop old and new has taken their shit to Nitebox on Wednesdays, hosted by Manchilde, Ziplocks and DJ Raid. This night had a nice vibe going last week when I stopped by, with a little open cordless-mic action to get the crowd hype. I just might have to snatch the mic this week, 'cause I'm running out of space over here. If you haven't checked out Tokyo's Sunday night lineup, you probably should. The Tokyo All Stars pull musicians and vocalists from some of the city's best R&B bands and let them do their thing all night. Members of Co-Soul, Tribal Groove, the Aliens and others keep it tight onstage with a soulful and funky atmosphere. If you haven't noticed, the Jazz Fest is slowly but surely creeping up on us, with all kinds of musical treats for just about every taste. Swish this around in yer mouth: scratch psycho Mix Master Mike of the Invisible Skratch Piklz--and most recently a Beastie Boys stint--is coming to town for the fest. Also slated for the midnight sessions at Metropolis are Brazilian stallion Amon Tobin and his mathematical approach to drum & bass; Thievery Corporation, doing a fairly convincing impression of an American Kruder and Dorfmeister, as well as Kid Loco and 4-Hero. There's one for every night of the festival, so consult your calendars now and watch this space for further musical developments.