>>Highs

Welcome to fag-o-land The Black & Blue's this weekend. City already looking pretty fruity.

Simon Reynolds' Energy Flash The most obnoxiously egotistical and disgustingly self-congratulatory complete history of rave ever written. What a pig.

UVBC Back on the block featuring various members of other local bands that used to be on SSG, too. "Rockin' blues" thing still somewhat embarrassing, though.

That crazy Leonardo Our kid DiCaprio was seen coked off his head in NYC club Life last weekend with Marky Mark Wahlberg. Gotcha, sugar boy.

Stereo New afterhours club. Small. Loud. Interesting leftover wood sculpture decor from the '60s. Cool. Ish.

>>Lows

The owners of Stereo Think they have given humankind a gift of unprecedented historic value. Either that or their dicks have suddenly grown elephantine, in which case, all is forgiven.

The "new OK Cola campaign" ...is actually just another crotchety old Coke campaign. Um, oops.

The travellers' scene becoming suspiciously "hip" Tie-dye, trance dancing, myrrh toothpaste and people who smell like caca-pipi on sourdough ain't our idea of a party. Thanks.

Felicity Latest in onslaught of sensitive soaps for under-25s. Over-25s currently harbouring fantasies of killing main character.

Pop tunes about the millennium Oh, for fuck's sake.