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Bunny lady >> The sleazy secrets of country music cutie Neko Case by RUPERT BOTTENBERG
If you know your porn like Case knows her porn, you'll agree that Playboy is the Rolls Royce of this demimonde. Cold, sleek, and probably too classy for a lowbrow like yourself. Gallery, on the other hand is the Plymouth Barracuda... fast, loud fun for the common folk."It's more like Hustler," says Case, "it's like straight-up porn. Dual penetration... group sex..." Of course, any skin rag should be proud to have its glossy pages graced with the image of Neko Case. She's a fine looking woman. Zaftig. Voluptuous. Curvaceous. And she's ready to play the game, if you catch my drift. "The interview was fucking hilarious. The guy kept talking about music, and finally I just said, 'When are we gonna talk about the porn?' "I told him there's a lot of things I'd like to see in Gallery. A little more multi-ethnicity. I'd like to see less fucking pumps! This is the '90s! Who wears those things anymore? Nobody! I'd like to see more real breasts, although you know, I do see a lot of real female breasts in there, so kudos to them. And then I said I'd like to see more nice-looking, or at least regular-looking guys. And then--I couldn't help it--I said, 'By the way... I've been masturbating the whole time.'" No such luck for this interviewer. If Miss Case was in fact petting the kitty, she kept a resolute poker face (or voice, rather) the whole way through. At least until she decided to take a detour down Misanthropy Lane, that is. "Basically it all boils down to my hatred of other people. And how fucking disgusted I am with them because they won't fight for anything. They don't give a shit about themselves. They think there's this morality which is some kind of bottom line. And they use this morality to feel better than other people. Etcetera, etcetera. I could go on all day. They make me sick." Jesus, what a bitch. Must be rough on her boyfriends. Oh, did I mention her new Boyfriends (backup band, that is)? Last time round she had Toronto's Sadies playing behind her, but this time around... let's just say that the Hefner hare ain't the only bunny in Case's life. "They're young, they're sexy, they're completely out of control," she purrs. You guessed it... the West Island's own Local Rabbits. If you know the rascally rockeurs, you know the genuine affection they harbour for C&W. No joke... the boys will bust a flawless line dance at the drop of a Stetson. Offered a crack at a full-blown set of cool, Case-style country twang... hell, they must have spit out their carrot juice. Right. Music, music, music... this is getting boring--like a Gallery article or something. Let's try segue back to the good stuff. One can draw a comparison between the aesthetic decline of both porn ('60s Playboy vs. '90s Playboy) and C&W (Johnny Cash vs. Garth Brooks). How does Case feel about the matter? "I don't have a problem with the music, I have a problem with the radio station programmers and marketers. Because I don't think what's called new country is country music at all. But it's not like I have a license to say what's what. I don't think it's the artists who are the offenders, it's the people who just want to make money off the music that offend me. They're evil. They offend me!" I'm starting to think everything offends this mean-spirited broad. Well, almost everything. "I like homemade porn... photos and videos. I have this big collection of porn that my friends have given me. Most of it's kinda softcore, and hilarious, but some of it's more hardcore. And equally hilarious. I think hardcore porn can be really good, but no one ever goes that extra mile to make it good." Christ, there's no pleasing Neko, is there. Neko Case and her Boyfriends play Jailhouse Rock on Thursday, June 11 with the Subumlauts, les Abdigritionistes, Mitsiko Miller, Tiff and a play called How Sad About Us, 8pm, $6
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Yeah, so you noticed the Playboy pillow, too. Don't misinterpret it for simple product placement, though. You see, the Vancouver-based alterna-country princess, once of girly garage punk outfit Maow, owes the esteemed publication a token of gratitude. "My record was reviewed in Playboy," she says. "It was a thrill, all right. But, I was interviewed by Gallery magazine. That was the highlight of my interview career."