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by Rupert Bottenberg Only in a town like ours would a decade and a half of moral turpitude be in fact a cause for celebration. Here's a guide to some of the demons of drunks past that Foufounes Électriques have scared up for their two-week marathon of mortification:
Flesh for fantasy NYC's Fleshtones have been around the block so many times they're getting dizzy. Regardless, these old warhorses can still deliver one of the finest garage rock rave-up party blowouts on this continent. Their reputation is staked on it. In fact, Dave Cooper of the Planet Smashers says, "I can't believe these guys are opening for us! I've been into the Fleshtones since I was a kid, when we'd look all over New Brunswick for their records!" Catch both bands on Thursday, May 28, 8pm, $10+taxes.
Acronymous callers remember that neat little logo that used to be liquid-papered on leather jackets everywhere in the '80s? M.T.L.H.C. in a cross formation, divvied up by a straight-edge X? If you don't, then YOU WEREN'T PUNK! Loser. Although S.C.U.M. and No Policy are noticeably absent, the Foufs crew have chased down the original members of Genetic Control, Bad Results and Fail Safe (all three on Friday, May 22), as well as Fair Warning, the Absurds, My Dog Popper and Unruled (on Friday, May 29). Both shows are $5, and start at 6:30pm. Geritol will be on tap, we understand. By the way, M.T.L.H.C. stands for Montreal Hardcore. Loser.
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Master of makeup, god of greasepaint The scourge of mimes and birthday clowns everywhere, opera-metalist King Diamond (once of Mercyful Fate) strives to make heavy foundation on men scary again. Cross yourself and pray for dawn as he swoops down like an evil poisonous vampire bat, with Pitbull Daycare on Tuesday, May 26, 8pm, $21.30+taxes.
Chez nous wave Believe it or not, la belle province once had its own contender in the post-B-52s nuevo wavo pop parade. That was in '82, they were (and still are) called Térapi, and they opened for the likes of Nina Hagen and the Fixx. Look, if Gary Numan's come back, and Tears for Fears never went away, then why can't Térapi dust off their leopard-print sleeveless Ts, wraparound shades and rainbow suspenders? Sunday, May 24, 8pm, $5+taxes.