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Ragin' Cuh-nay-jin >> Nardwuar is our ambassador of embarrassment by RUPERT BOTTENBERG
Mikhail Gorbachev "He came to Vancouver to open Science World. I was sitting at a pizza place with a friend, and we were wondering what to ask him. I thought I would say, 'Keep on rockin' in the free world,' which is of course the catchphrase of Canada's greatest rock legend, Neil Young. I decided to learn that in Russian, so I said 'Durshney rockin' oos slabotney sviet,' and I asked him which of the world leaders he'd met had the biggest pants. Just before he could answer they cut him off and said he had other matters to attend to. But you could see he was actually smiling." Pierre Berton "We put out a version of Louie Louie, but this version was by Billy Childish of Thee Headcoats, and it was about Louis Riel. I got Pierre Berton to write the liner notes! Also, Berton has a little interview segment on the record, where I asked him if he'd ever done hallucinogenics. Out of the blue, he says, 'Yeah, I smoke pot! I still smoke with my kids, it's really great!'" Drew Barrymore "She actually flashed her appendages to me, which unfortunately I did not get on tape. I don't know if she was drunk at the time, but apparently she had $10,000 in her backpack, which is pretty amazing. She got it ripped off a couple of weeks later." Dan Quayle "I had a chance to ask him one question, and it was the name of the prime minister of Canada. He didn't know. He completely sidestepped the issue." Pierre Trudeau "If Maggie Trudeau wanted to listen to any punk rock or Rolling Stones while they lived together at 24 Sussex, she had to sit on the sundeck and listen to it through headphones. I asked Pierre Trudeau if he had in fact banned rock 'n' roll from 24 Sussex, and he said, 'Yeah, I didn't let her, I don't like rock 'n' roll.' Everyone at the press conference was like, 'You asked him about Maggie! He hasn't talked about her in years!' People are so afraid to ask questions that might upset somebody!" The Evaporators play Blizzarts with The Skablins and Karl's Auto Parts on Saturday, May 23, 9pm, $5. Full transcriptions of Nardwuar's interviews can be found at www.nardwuar.com
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Call him a klutz, but colour him Canadian. For the last decade, Vancouver's Nardwuar the Human Serviette has championed Canadian garage rock as a promoter, label owner and frontman of the Evaporators. In his quest for cool space-filler sound bites, however, Nardwuar has also bumbled his way into being one of our nation's most intrepid journalists. He's been chewed out by Beck, beaten up by Sonic Youth and robbed of his tuque by Skid Row's Sebastian Bach. Undaunted, he's gone head to empty head with even greater game. For instance: