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This week: A brutal attack on CKUT! Plus: Sexist remarks about Dawson students, Mirror staff!! "edited" by AL SOUTH FAXRANT Seeing as it's their 10th anniversary, I think it's important for someone to point out that CKUT SUCKS! No one listens to it! CKUT [or C-KUNT, as most people used to call it back when they cared enough to insult it] is more like a TV station than a radio station--you have to plan in advance to listen to the handful of good shows they have. What kind of radio station is that? Since you NEVER KNOW what you're gonna get if you just turn it on, most people have long since stopped putting it on. I mean, I live in the middle of the Plateau and I don't know anyone who listens to it. Ten years ago, the FM license should have gone to CRSG, which used to play local bands ALL THE TIME. There were local band HITS, for Christ's sake. Now that's a working public medium. But not CKUT. They're so proud of their oh-so-democratic slots for every style of music and political cause that's ever existed that they could care less if hardly anyone listens to it. Either that, or they're just too lazy or disorganized to change. Whatever it is, they SUCK! [BLEEP!] [Ed's note: The faxer also noted that he was a m and thoughtfully provided his own CAPITALS] M Re: The Mirror's Judas Priest Jugulator /Saxon Unleash the Beast double review in the compact disc section. I quote: "The dinosaur of heavy metal has indeed AWAKEN." My rant is this: get some editors who speak English or at least read English. Mistakes like this drive people like me--English teachers and so forth--insane. I guess that the normal average people who have no brain won't pick up on it. But it annoys the poop out of me. [BLEEP!] F Hi, this is for the person who was complaining about [local label] SSG fucking up their CD bar coding, which somehow fucked up their band Tricky Woo's royalties. Well, maybe you should learn a little bit about the music industry and how it works. First, the only way that someone makes money off records is by the sales to distributors or to the stores, not from the list price that comes through when they actually sell them at the counter. So the only thing that fucks up is maybe some statistics, or maybe the store not getting to order back on time. So don't come down on guys who are working hard on a small indie label if you don't know what you are talking about. [BLEEP!] M Who the fuck cares about cops, Rockbitch and YAWP!?? I wanna know about Rufus Wainwright! The only thing that Montreal cares about is Rufus Wainwright. He said he'd have a record out in October--October's gone and there's no record. Yet I don't see any stories about him. Montreal wants to know! What about Rufus Wainwright!? [BLEEP!] M This is a message from your friendly neighbourhood Shock Communications. This week, we're gonna talk about the Goldie show in Toronto, because we've been getting a lot of calls from angry, angry people saying, "Shock, why did you not do the show in Montreal?" Well, the reason everybody is angry is because certain journalists--we won't name any names--try to cause problems by saying that Shock is mean to bring Goldie to Toronto. Everyone else reads that and thinks Shock is evil. Well, if these certain journalists would understand the music industry a bit more, they would realize that it is not Shock who has the say of where Goldie is going to play. It is an AGENT who represents Goldie who plans the tour. Our first choice and our number one priority as Shock is do to our shows in here Montreal. So we apologize, but the fact is the only Goldie date available in Canada was in Toronto, so we have to do it there. We just wish certain journalists would check their facts before writing things, then no one would be angry and everyone would understand. Thank you. [BLEEP!] M Mireille Silcott looks hot in that 3 AM Eternal photo. But you cropped out her most fabulous FEATURES! [BLEEP!] F Hello my name is... well, I'll leave my name out. I'm a Dawson college student and my rant is about all those fucked-up chicks who come to school wearing three-inch heels and miniskirts and shiny shirts and showing their TITS. I just wonder what those bitches wear when they go out. Later. [BLEEP!] M This is a note to Sasha to go along with her quip on female lesbian dinosaurs. What do you call a male gay dinosaur? A megasorass. Hehehe. Okay, bye. [BLEEP!] F Hi, I'm calling to comment about your sex columnist Sasha. She's a very beautiful and sexy girl. I'd love to see if her anatomy is as SCRUMPTIOUS looking as she is. [BLEEP!] M Hello, this is to that rant against the man who ranted against the former cop in general and security guards specifically. Well, I'm a security guard, and I wanna say this: I'd like to see that ranter stand up for eight hours a day, sometimes 12 hours, and act civil when people call him an asshole to his face. To be a moving target in a uniform for every Tom, Dick and Harry! To have that in his head all night when he's working! I applaud that ex-cop! [BLEEP!] Next week: Open forum
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