Boo!

The completely non-scary Halloween club guide

by MIREILLE SILCOTT

Maybe it's the insane social pressure to have fun, but institutionalized holidays just rub me the wrong way. Christmas? Bah, humbug to all that, and the same goes for the dreaded holiday coming up this Friday, Halloween. Heartless, I know. I haven't located the child in my adult psyche. But that's the way it is. So in this Halloween guide, which contains some totally worthy and really AMAZING club nights, you will not encounter the words "scary," "ghoulish," "wicked," "spooky," "creepy," "horror," "horrifying," "horrific," or any "tricks" or "treats," beyond this point. Because there is nothing particularly sc**ry about drunk revellers dressed up as condoms or Oreo cookies. Except, of course, that they left their houses that way.

CLUBBY CLUBS

Groove Society takes the cake for over-the-topness this October 31st. Their Halloween glut starts on the 30th, with their gay night, Him, throwing a Fifth Element party ($6). The club will be decorated like a spaceship and costume code is "futuristic." Prizes for the best glue-gun creation amount to $1,500. On the 31st, however, Groove is plotting a Halloween bash (this one's for the straights, I take it) which is slightly more involved. The Krush Groove Night is a, er, Late '80s B-Boy Halloween, which means you may find 500 people in the place dressed like Kid & Play. All kinds of prizes for the best pimp, gangsta, hooker, b-boy or mod (mod? How'd they get in there?). I'm sure Groove's female clientele will have no prob with the hooker motif. DJs Zadio, Storm, Choice and others. 1288 Amherst, $6 with costume/$10 without. Info: 859-9055.

Sona goes up against Groove full-throttle by bringing in U.K. live techno heavies, The Advent, who are schlepping along 80 kilos of gear and not a single DAT. Playing in the big room are Tiga (who has promised to don his Swedish milkmaid's get-up), XL (supposedly dressing as Iggy Pop again) and Jason. Also Luc Raymond (going in for that old St. Hyacinthe farmer costume for the fifth year running), plus Jordan Dare and Rob Brown (no costume necessary) in the lounge. Best costume wins $1000, 2nd place wins a trip to every Sona-ite's fave destination, Miami Beach (home of several thousand Crazy Eddies) and third wins a $600 gift certificate at the Face London boutique, where every day is seemingly Halloween.

Into the depths of the Village, Sky has donated the entire weekend to dressing up. The highlight is Friday's "Blackout Ténèbres" party, with no lights and "as little clothes as possible" as dress code. Flashlight given out to the first 400 heads. (I hope they are giving out lube with those.) DJs throughout the weekend are Stéphane Grondin, Serge, Bobzilla and Gilles Jr. 1474 Ste-Catherine E., info: 529-6969.

And finally, the largest party for the Black & Blue set seems to be happening at Storm, with the Bal en Noir, MC'd by Mado. Twisted's head honcho Rob di Stefano spins with Mark Anthony, Peter Crno and Sylvain Girard. Alain Vinet plays upstairs. $6000 in prizes to give out to 10 lucky winners, and the doors open at 10:30pm. Not to be missed, and a portion of the profits go to AIDS research. 1298 Amherst, $18 advance/$20 door. Info: 94-STORM.

LIVE ROCKIN' SHINDIGS

Local lurchers will want to check Grim Skunk's label Indica, launching the imprint's third album, by Guano on Friday. Line Three, the band that SHOULD have won the Polliwog, play too. At Foufounes, a venue with much historical Halloween-ness to it. 9pm, 87 Ste-Catherine E., $5.

If not, the Soudain... les monstres comp is being launched (featuring Cafféine et les Bodums and WD-40) at Café Chaos. 8pm, 1635 St-Denis, $5. But if "men, women and chainsaws" are more your thing, then you'll want to give weirdo-about-town and American Devices dude Rick Trembles a call at Bar Fly, wearing your best "old punkers never die.." costume. 4062 St-Laurent, $3.

What's Halloween without a bit of charity for the kids? Help Jazz Pharmacy clear up their poster fines by seeing them at Quartier Latin at 9pm. 318 Ontario E., $5.

OTHER EVENTS!

The Rituals monthly is doing the dress-up thing on Saturday, and their flyer says "costume required," so don't throw that eye-holed sheet in the trash after Friday night. Zadio, T'Cha and Nanz spin, along with MC Manchilde. At Isart, 265 St-Antoine W., $5 before midnight/$7 after.

And finally, for those kiddie ravers who've been brushing up their fun-fur mascot costumes, a hardcore extravaganza called Mutations is happening Friday, with French hardcore god and Industrial Strength magnate, Manu Le Malin headlining the bill. New York's Nikadeemas and Bristol's DJ Cridge (breaks) and many locals, including tag team Gnat & Sase One, Yaz and Pfreud play too. Tickets are $25 at the door, $15-20 pre-sale. For all location and ticket info, call Cyborg at 990-3011.