Angel >> France, for the good sex you can get over there. Yes, their slightly meddlesome stand on Quebec sovereignty is irksome, but you've got to hand it to them when it comes to l'amour. This year's survey of sexual practices conducted by condom manufacturer Durex (makers of the Ramses brand) found that the French have not only passed the Americans for their proficiency (the French have sex 151 times a year on average, the Americans 148), they also surpassed Canadians as the most "considerate" lovers, with more than 50 per cent saying that partner satisfaction was their top priority.

Insect >> MUC Chief of Police Jacques Duchesneau, for using strong-arm tactics to uphold the image of the MUC police. Annoyed by footage of real police officers uttering swear words and nasty epithets in an episode of the cinéma vérité series Métier Policier last month, Duchesneau met with the show's producers to hint strongly that they should start censoring the harsher scenes of police portrayals. What's more, Duchesneau was sufficiently angered at the presence of the Coalition opposée à la brutalité policière (COBP) at a public meeting with members of the Brazilian police force two weeks ago that he phoned the meeting's organizers and gave them shit. Duchesneau reportedly said the COBP made the Montreal police look bad.