Old world rules

Community organizing feminist unites
immigrant moms and their Canadian-ized
daughters to hash out mutual understanding

by CHRIS BARRY

Name: Maimouna Diakhaby

Age: 24

Occupation: Community organizer

Bio: This tasty downtown damsel arrived here from Guinea six years ago to develop her considerable community organizin’ skills at Concordia and a series of rewarding internships at community outreach organizations in Côte-des-Neiges. A self-described “feminist who likes to work with women for other women,” Maimouna says, “It’s very important to me that whatever I do professionally be consistent with my values, which is why I love working with people in this capacity so much—everything about this job aligns for me.” Among her duties at said gig with Femmes du monde à Côte-des-Neiges is hosting a group called Mothers From Afar, Daughters From Here, a project aimed at helping the Quebec-born daughters of first generation immigrants and their old world mothers better understand one another in light of the inter-generational cultural differences they face. “These girls have grown up Québécoise but they’re also of the cultures of their mothers, so it’s a matter of juggling these two cultures for them.” If you’re between 18–25 and this sounds like your situation, then call (514) 735-9027 to register or simply drop by 6767 Côte-des-Neiges, room 597, next Tuesday at 6:30 p.m. For mothers, meetings go down every second Tuesday at 1:15 p.m.

Is she some kind of family mediator encouraging, for example, some recent immigrants’ daughter to finally accept and embrace her ritual circumcision in exchange for her mother allowing her to tune in Canadian Idol every second week? “No. I’m not a therapist. I don’t know all the answers for them. The purpose of this project, for now, is mainly to understand and map the issues these women are facing while hopefully helping mothers and daughters through the journey of their relationship. Women have the tools within themselves to confront their own issues, even more so when they work at it jointly with other women. That’s the approach we take. It’s not group therapy but more a group where we share issues and come together to try and find solutions.”

The most common ethnicities participating: “Oh, they’re from all over: Italy, Africa and Arabic countries mostly.”

Italy? What possible inter-generational conflicts are Italian chicks having with their old world moms? How best to cook up a lasagna? “No, difficulties among generations are universal—immigration just exacerbates the problem. Even though the actual issues might be different between an Italian girl and an African girl, when we get together, they can all relate because many of the issues transcend cultures.”

One issue that consistently “transcends cultures:” “Sexuality and at what age girls should start having sexual relationships. It’s very difficult for mothers raised in cultures where pre-marital sex is taboo.”

Are arranged marriages another common issue? “We’ve certainly seen participants in arranged marriages here before, one quite recently who worked it out with her parents.”

Was an honour killing involved? “No, when they finally spoke and her mother saw how unhappy her daughter was in the relationship, the marriage just ended.”

Childhood ambition: To become president of Guinea.

Last book read: Women Who Run With the Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estés.

Musical preferences: Salif Keita, Tracy Chapman, Kalmunity.

Words of wisdom: “Until all women are free, we will be on the march.”

Comments: dimwit@hdot.net