MAN FUCKS
HORSE!

We couldn’t go proudly into 2010 before rounding out ’09 with a nice, easy to write sex-with-animals story, so snuggle up by the fire and strap yourself in—much the way Erick Rivera strapped in the horses at the Goshen Historic Track during his numerous carnal callings over the six-month equine hump-a-thon that police are proud to say they have finally brought to a halt.

The 18-year-old Rivera, whose horse-fucking escapades are unlikely to ever be re-enacted on stage by Daniel Radcliffe, is accused of repeatedly entering the Hudson Valley, NY, racetrack after closing, as well as repeatedly entering the bridled and immobilized fillies stabled there.

Police had been investigating the late-night visitor since July but, despite having captured Rivera on security cameras, he proved more elusive in physical form. Until Rivera mis-timed his jaunt and was nabbed, post-coitus, as he fled the scene. Police say Rivera was staying in a rented room at an inn next door and had no ties to the track. He was charged with felony burglary, misdemeanour sexual misconduct with an animal and petty larceny. With Rivera seen coming or going on surveillance videos on at least a dozen occasions, further charges are expected.

by SCOTT SAXON