COOKIE DUSTER

Distinctive likeness: Spock’s pointy ears, Fonzie’s leather jacket, Christopher Walken’s bizarre neurological condition. Take away the thing that makes people unique and they become, well, ordinary. The Chive, a blog devoted to chronicling today’s most unmitigated displays of douchebaggery, presents seven famous mustachioed men sans ’stache, via the powers of Photoshop. Osama bin Laden comes out looking like a cheerfully smug investment banker and Burt Reynolds looks more wholesome and a lot less porno, but Hitler looks like a guy who has to let his new neighbours know he’s a registered sex offender, and Einstein like a guy trying to send back soup in a deli because it’s too salty at tinyurl.com/yfsgvaj.

Jibber jabber: Speaking of guys who look weird without facial hair (he kind of looks like the offspring of Jay Leno and a football), the Mr. T Virtual Playset lets you dress up B.A. Baracus’s mug with an elegant Petit Handlebar moustache, an Elvis pomp, a combover, a hardhat and giant novelty sunglasses among other accoutrements at ironicsans.com/MrT.html.