Rock bottom

Ang Lee’s Taking Woodstock is an uneven,
disappointing look back at the creation of
the legendary concert

SHAMBLING SHOWMAN: Martin (r)

by CHRISTOPHER SYKES

After sitting through Ang Lee’s latest feature Taking Woodstock, I feel confident venturing Lee has flipped his lid after the colossal success of Brokeback Mountain and is now hell-bent on pissing off as many minorities as possible.

Heading the aforementioned groups has to be the Jews, as protagonist Elliot (Demetri Martin) and his dysfunctional family fulfil more stereotypes than a 1980s-era Woody Allen flashback. Martin sticks around to help pull the family motel out of receivership and to run the town council. Mother-from-hell Sonia (Imelda Staunton) is the chief culprit, refusing to wash the sheets to save those pennies. Husband Jake (Henry Goodman) falls in line and can be seen dumping bleach into the new swimming pool because “it kills germs too, don’t it!”

Next on the list of slights has to be Vietnam vets, and Martin’s tatty-haired friend Billy (Emile Hirsch) pops up out of nowhere around the half-hour mark talking about fraggin’ zipperheads and tending to footless privates. Not a stable young man, I get it, but does he have to portray every veteran cliché?

The LGBT community—already divided over Brokeback—will be up in arms over the character of Vilma (Liev Schreiber), a hulking transvestite who is shown to be packing a couple of nines in his pantyhose: a 9mm and about nine inches. Brought in as a security guard to keep evil doers at bay, Schreiber also coaxes Martin into exploring his (homo)sexuality.

The plot can be summed up in two words: making Woodstock. When the original venue falls through, Martin proposes his town host the mega concert. The town then prepares for the concert, saving the family business. Then the concert attracts a half million young people from around the country. And that’s pretty much it, aside from an acid trip our hero takes while on his way to check out the fest.

He never gets to the stage, just as Taking Woodstock never really gets to the finish line. Fanboys will say it’s about the journey, not arriving at the destination. I say it’s a shame to botch the project by not leaving half the plot points on the cutting room floor.

TAKING WOODSTOCK OPENS
THIS FRIDAY, AUG. 28