Lieutenant Canada vs. Captain America

[Re: “America vs. Mirror,” Letters, Sept. 18] Captain America is right, the Mirror has taken the odd pot-shot at Americans, but do we really need to point out how many cheap shots the American rags, be they monthly glossies or alt weeklies, enjoy at our expense? Seriously, Cap’n, either grow some thicker skin or just don’t read the Mirror.

I can almost understand Captain America’s vitriolic hard-on for us Plateau-dwellers. Like all creative, left-leaning types who rove in packs, we can be unbearably smug and self-satisfied, and yes, when forced to pay retail, we’ve been known to sport American Apparel.

Really, Captain, congrats on calling us out on our fashion sense—it was as accurate as it was obvious and played out. What else can you tell us; do accountants wear drab-coloured suits and carry briefcases? Do cyclists wear spandex? Seriously, chief, your lazy characterizations could easily have described any Joe Hipster-Sixpack from Austin to Brooklyn.

Speaking of which, you ought to check out your own American backyard before throwing your hissy-fit at us. Maybe check out Williamsburg and try having a chat with one of your own, tragically hip locals. I think you’ll find that, by comparison, their smug, cultural elitism will make us supposedly-judgemental Plateau “Commies” seem like jolly, welcoming, corporate suits.

You see, Captain, if you didn’t already notice, every city in North America has its enclave of hipsters and preachy, liberal-minded types. Montreal’s version of this enclave, the Plateau, happens to be one of the most inclusive and welcoming.

Case in point: thanks to McGill’s low tuition fees and the comparatively low cost of living in the Plateau/student ghetto area, we’ve got more transient Yanks per square mile than do most other international cities, and I think most of these visiting Americans will tell you that they feel welcome in this community.

I will admit, Johnson Cummins’ Jimmy Buffet diatribe was a bit random, but the point was pretty clear to me: the Parrotheads, or fan legions of any other artistically marginal act, can make it difficult for more talented artists to break through and be heard. It’s a valid point, and it was amusingly illustrated. But there’s no use crying over spilt margaritas.

Put another way, Captain America, I do care about Jimmy Buffet, so if reading about him bothers you, put down the Mirror, jam those iPod earbuds in as far as they go, crank the Nickelback, and go to your Happy Place. (Note to Captain: we pronounce it “LEFT-tenant” up here, just to keep you guessing.)

>>Lieutenant Canada

God loves queers

[Re: “Evil is not God’s fault,” Letters, Sept. 4] I just read John Hill’s letter and feel drawn into this ongoing public debate, owing to his equating of homosexuality with evil.

Hill’s idea of Good embraces an inequitable division of power typified by the honorific title “Supreme Being,” which he uses to describe his God. In any case, the God of John Hill surely loves everybody and wants everybody to be saved, even queers. Surely (I hope) this God has given each of the many different kinds of human being equal capacities to enact Goodness in the world.

I hesitate to challenge John Hill’s ideas about the origins of the universe, as I am not a physicist. However, I must say that this universe may or may not have created itself. It’s possible that this universe shares points of intersection with other universes, in which case, the point of origin could, for example, occur at an intersection with a universe in which causes follow effects (and the laws of physics in such universes could be very different). In this state of mutual interconnection, universes (with different laws regarding, for example, the relationships between time and matter) could mutually create each other.

In any case, thank you for writing, Mr. Hill, as your letter encourages me to continue to stand up and speak out with respect to the places for queer people in society, and the end of authoritarian hierarchies.

>>Timothy Swinghamer

Student Survival
Guide Corrections

• YES Montreal’s (formerly referred to as Youth Employment Services) address was printed incorrectly. Their current address is 666 Sherbrooke W., 7th floor.

• The Women’s Y at 1355 René-Levesque is no longer operating.

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