Dear Sasha, Every time my partner and I make love, he has to rinse his schlong right after, otherwise I burn him. I literally burn his manhood. The skin on his schlong gets irritated for a couple of days afterwards, but if he rinses off right after, it doesn’t.
We both have annual medical exams including screening for STIs. My doctor hasn’t been able to shed any light on this either. I don’t know if my foufoun is too acidic for him or if there’s such a thing as incompatible sexual organs/fluids.
I thought it might be linked to my menstrual cycle, perhaps I get a bit acidic right before or after my menstrual cycle. I was wondering if you’ve heard of such a thing and if so what we can do fix this.
-Singeing Coochie
Dear Singeing,
Let’s assume you’ve established that this hasn’t been a problem for either of you in your sex lives until now. Given that when your boyfriend washes post sex he doesn’t get a rash, let’s look at two things: a sensitivity to your vaginal juices or to the lubricant you may be using during sex. If it’s a lubricant issue, try using something like the unflavoured versions of Hathor or Good Clean Love.
There is such a thing as incompatible sex fluids but you’ll find more information on it going the other way—a yeast infection that manifests after someone ejaculates their sperm (sperm is super alkaline, with a pH of 8) into your acidic vagina, throwing off the delicate pH. If this doesn’t sort itself out after a little while, it may be indicative of a semen allergy: www.coolnurse.com/semen_allergy.htm.
A healthy pH sits at around 4.3 (which, by the way, is the exact acidity of a glass of tomato juice). There’s a home test available to determine whether it has gone above that, which would indicate that you might have an infection like yeast or BV. The problem with this test is that it doesn’t measure a vagina’s acidity below this, so say, if your vagina was as acidic as grapefruit juice (3.2) it couldn’t tell you that. The other problem with this product is that at the moment, it’s only available in the States.
If your gynaecologist cannot provide you with a test to measure the acidity of your vagina (because a more alkaline vagina could be a problem, too) I suggest you inquire with other sources, and perhaps consider opening up you and your boyfriend’s health care to complementary medicine like a homeopath, a naturopath or a dermatologist.
Sexual health educator Lyba Spring says she has heard of sensitivity to vaginal fluids but was unable to find any clinical information about it. Keep your boyfriend washing his weiner post sex, and I’ll let you know if anything else comes down the pipes on my end. And just so you know, your vag is less acidic before and after your period, not more.
Dear Sasha, I had a girlfriend who enjoyed peeing on me when we had sex. I found it weird but used to enjoy it and I thought nothing of it after we broke up. A few years later I’ve developed a fetish for it and feel I won’t be happy unless I find someone with the same interest. I don’t have the guts to bring it up with a girl, so I’m considering trying the gay and shemale scene as I’ve heard it might be easier. Am I a freak?
I’ve searched the web for forums and discussion boards with no success. Is there somewhere on the Web or in the actual world where I can meet people who share my fetish or am I destined to search for Internet porn? Other than my weird fetish I’m a normal guy and would love to find someone normal and boring out there that likes the occasional wet sex.
—Misses the Wetness
Dear Wetness,
You have a peeing fetish that you simply can’t find a biological woman to satisfy so you’ll just have to turn to the gay or shemale scene to get your fix. You have no choice! It’s not your fault you can’t find a girl to perform this perfectly ordinary fetish—your hand’s been forced, you’ll have to turn to the queers for it. Even though you’re normal!
Wetness, it’s okay that you want someone with a dick to pee on you and yes, you may even find it easier to procure. Either way, you are not a freak.
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