Clothes make the con

Some ex-cons, upon being released from jail, take the vow never to touch anything remotely incriminating, so desperate are they to avoid going back inside. But for former Chatham County, Georgia, inmate Bill Merritt, 49, it was the irrational fear of being caught in stolen clothes that got him tossed right back.

Merritt, who spent the previous two days behind bars for criminal trespass and disorderly conduct, was picked up by Savannah-Chatham cops one day shortly after noon while strolling along the side of a busy road, stark naked with his hands folded over his privates. When questioned about his lack of clothing, he reportedly told the police he did not want the clothes he had been given because he thought they were stolen. “He appeared rational, except for being naked,” said the police report.

Emergency responders wrapped Merritt in a bed sheet before driving him back to the jail he’d just left, which was fortunately less than a mile away. He is being charged with public indecency.

by PATRICK LEJTENYI