The best of crimes
in the worst of times

by JACK OATMON

March is coming in like a lion, as the adage would have it. And though the closure of two of the most promising new venues in town within the past two weeks, SingSing restaurant and lab.synthèse, has cast an ominous foreshadow on the spring, there are easily enough brouhahas brewin’ for us to raise a glass to victims of prohibitive landlords and drown our sorrows. So pay your respects and ponder what you can do to help folks out in these troubled days as you enjoy the fruits of the awesome scene here in Montreal, as evidenced by all these crazy parties I’m about to tell you about.

Recent Maritime migrant and purveyor of fine sequenced temper tantrums A/V is joined by Swede technocrat Ploctor for an evening of lo-fi synth jams and boogying wallflowers at Friendship Cove tonight, Thursday. If you prefer your 4/4 beats with 30-somethings and $80 haircuts (rather than floor-bound 40-ouncers and hand-rolled smokes), drop by les Passages on Rachel for an excellent evening of minimal house with Archipel label people Pheek, Jesse Voltaire and le Cantin, a likely meet-and-greet in anticipation of Saturday night. But we’ll get to that.

Friday night promises two very wicked bro-downs on opposite sides of the Plateau, so choose wisely. You’ve got the Art Matters opening party at Studio Juste Pour Rire on the one hand. That’s with the crazy-stacked line-up of Hatchmatik, Woodhands, Ghislain Poirier, Sixtoo and BlingMod, so expect big crowds, big sneakers, low-latitude beats, lots of attitude and heavy-duty low-end. Guaranteed blowout. On the other hand, all the way up at Zoobizarre, those in search of a serious disco freakout complete with more sweet strings, Italo basslines, ineffectual Pidgin English choruses and androgynous outfits than you can shake a Giorgio Moroder LP at, will be more than pleased. That’s New Jersey’s Mike Simonetti, founder of Italians Do It Better and Troubleman Unlimited, two labels that have been garnering, transmitting and generally producing a lot of buzz in the past couple of years with their rosters of in-vogue new wave revivalists, indie favourites and noise acts. He’ll be joined by Why, Alex, Why? and Chris Paré.

And on to Saturday night, la Nuit Blanche—perhaps the coolest holiday ever devised. Also something of a carte blanche, given the amount of all-night bugging out you can do and still feel like a well-adjusted member of society. I’ll probably be doing the art gallery hop, but I plan to punctuate that with interludes at Metropolis for la Nuit Électronik, where one of the weirdest, funnest dance parties of the year will go down. Headliner Ricardo Villalobos needs no introduction, but it must be said that, as one of the true masters of long, subtle techno trips that build you up and don’t tire you out, he makes a great choice for a long night out. The rest of the huge line-up promises to deftly follow suit.

On Sunday, after all that, perhaps you’ll want to chill out at Lambi with DJ Bonobo and his jazzy loops, breaks, sophisticated samples and downtempo delights for the discombobulated soul. Or if you still want to get stupid, you only have to hit les Saints for the ramshackle R&B and clever sleaze of Hey Willpower as well as former le Tigre members Men on the decks.

AIN’T GOIN’ OUT LIKE A LAMB… jack.oatmon@gmail.com