Shake hands with the devil

There probably are a few situations in which a man could cut off his own hand and not end up in an asylum—to free himself from a bear trap, let’s say, or over his deep shame of writing watered-down pap for a third-rate weekly—but a 20-something Hayden, Idaho, man gave neither of those reasons. Instead, he claimed his hand bore the mark of the beast and he had severed it to escape God’s wrath. Then, maybe in case God thought to check the man’s trash for the missing hand, he tossed it into the microwave.

Police were dispatched to the man’s house after he called 911 to report he’d severed his hand with a circular saw and might need some tending to. Officers found him calmly awaiting their arrival, his arm bound in a tourniquet. The man explained what he’d done and why, then directed police to the microwave, where they found his sizzling appendage. A police spokesperson said no markings or tattoos were noted, but admitted the hand was “somewhat cooked” by the time police got there.

The man was put in protective custody in the Kootenai County Hospital mental health ward.

by Scott Saxon