Crunch-time crutch

>> Academic honesty raises moral questions for essay writer and tutor

by CHRIS BARRY

Name: Zack Fille

Age: 23

Occupation:Philosopher/essay writer/tutor/waiter

Bio: Upon graduating with a BA in philosophy from Concordia University last year, this energized Plateau hunk began hunting for work in the ESL field only to find himself frustrated by the lack of teaching opportunities available to him. Hating life while slaving away at the Slovenia Meat Market on the Main for $10 an hour, Zack says he suddenly recalled that his mother, upon first arriving in Montreal, had also experienced difficulty finding steady employment, encouraging her to launch what inevitably turned out to be a successful clothing business. Taking a cue from his mammy, Zack soon got busy posting flyers around Concordia and McGill offering tutoring, editing and essay-writing services to one and all looking for help with their academic endeavours, “and right away I started getting clients.” Although he’s doing okay financially with his latest endeavour, he still brings in a few extra bucks by working as a waiter for a local caterer hot on the always-colourful Jewish wedding/bar mitzvah scene.

The percentage of his clients who are truly academically challenged, as opposed to being just lazy and dishonest: “About 40 to 50 per cent of my students don’t want to do the work themselves, expecting me to help them out a lot. But the other half are really focused and prepared, people looking to get the most out of the time I spend with them. For many of them, English isn’t their first language.”

If somebody calls up saying they have a 1,500-word essay due next week outlining the Marxist-feminist perspective with respect to 17th century cow-milking in the Spanish provinces and knows absolutely nothing on the subject, will he write the entire paper for them? “Yes—for the right price.”

What that “right price” is: “Roughly $15 a page, but if it’s a subject I know nothing about then I might charge, say, $20 a page. I think that’s pretty reasonable, especially when you consider how long it takes to write a paper from scratch. The thing with academic writing is that it’s applicable to any subject. You just have to learn the method—once you’ve got that down, you can write about almost anything and do well.”

His final GPA at Concordia: 3.5

Another service Zack offers: “I tutor people on how to manage the world of academia. You know, time management, how to deal with professors and bureaucratic stuff like that. Actually, tutoring is what I do most of, and I much prefer that. Writing someone else’s paper brings up moral questions, but there are no moral issues involved when it comes to tutoring or editing someone’s academic paper.”

Would he allow a dentist who hired him to write his final
term paper perform a root canal on one of his back molars?
“Definitely not!”

Current ambition: To teach English in the Quebec hinterland.

Musical preferences: X, the Deadly Snakes, Eno, Brigitte Bardot, the Residents.

Last book read: Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? by Philip K. Dick

Words of wisdom: “No one ever called Pablo Picasso an asshole.”

Comments: dimwit@hdot.net