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by JOHN CUSTODIO
DJs, drag queens and porn stars as superheroes? To the
denizens of the discotheque demimonde, it’s not that big a stretch, so
it makes perfect sense as a theme for this year’s 13th edition of Bal
en Blanc, Montreal’s annual Easter weekend extravaganza of
dancing-’til-you-drop-your-next-hit-of-whatever-it-is-that-keeps-you-dancing.
But what if the stars of this year’s party really were superheroes? We
had to ask.
Peter Rauhofer
 
Superman
Aliases:
Club 69, Size Queen
Superpowers: Destroyer of evil
How he got ’em: He was born a
god
Secret identity: Superstar DJ
Peter Rauhofer
His kryptonite: No one knows
yet, and he won’t tell.
Superhero idol: Superman
Superhero crush: Superman
HQ: www.peterrauhofer.com
Bal en Blanc mission: The Main
Event (Sunday, April 8 at the Palais des Congrès)
Erik El
 
Invisible Girl
Aliases: J-F Grenier, Amerik
Superpowers: Teleportation
How he got ’em: They were
bestowed on him one magical night at Playground, the famous afterhours
club and vortex of super-tripping, by one of its quasi-omniscient
denizens, the mysterious Aladin
Secret identity: Amerik the
plane pilot
His kryptonite: Invisible
Girl. “I’m powerless around her.”
Superhero idol: The Invisible
Man. “He can spy on just about anyone, whenever he likes.”
Superhero crush: Invisible
Girl, “especially as played by Jessica Alba.”
HQ: Circus Afterhours
Bal en Blanc missions: White
House Party (Thursday, April 5 at House), White Sleaze Party (Sunday,
April 8 at Parking) and the Off White/After Eight Party (Monday, April
9 at Stereobar)
Jester
 
Catwoman
Superpowers: Peacemaker
extraordinaire
How he got ’em: His parents
were hippies
His kryptonite: “Uh, acid.”
Superhero idol: Captain Flame.
“I’m not the type, but a man in tights…”
Superhero crush: Catwoman
HQ: www.jestermuzik.com,
www.myspace.com/jestermuzik
Bal en Blanc missions: White
Lantern Party (Thursday, April 5 at Red-Lite), Off White/After Eight
Party (Monday, April 9 at Stereobar)
Short Cut
 
Superman
Superpowers: Bestows
money-making powers on the creatively deserving
How he got ’em: Discovered
them himself by doing what he loves
Secret identity:
Banker/accountant
His kryptonite: Inflation
Superhero idol: Superman
Superhero crush: Mystique.
“She’d take whatever shape I want, when I want.”
HQ: Red-Lite
Bal en Blanc mission: Hustler
White Party (Thursday, April 5 at Club Unity)
Patrick Dream
 
Daredevil
Superpowers: Conjurer of
curries
How he got ’em: “By eating
radioactive curry, of course.”
Secret identity: A
mild-mannered neighbourhood dépanneur clerk.
His kryptonite: “McDonald’s
‘food’. It makes me totally sick.”
Superhero idol: Daredevil
(despite Ben Affleck). “He’s known as ‘the man without fear.’”
Superhero crush: Aeon Flux
(thanks to Charlize Theron)
HQ: Bombay Records, Mile End
Records
Bal en Blanc mission: White
Sleaze Party (Sunday, April 8 at Parking)
DJ Wizz
 
Wonder Woman
Alias: Steve Arsenault
Superpowers: Able to
telepathically manipulate the entire sound spectrum, allowing him to
move even the most immovable objects
How he got ’em: Lightning
struck his gear in the middle of a set
Secret identity: Security
guard at a DJ equipment store
His kryptonite: Dog whistles
Superhero idol: Superman
Superhero crush: Wonder Woman
HQ: M.E.M Records
Bal en Blanc mission: The Main
Event (Sunday, April 8 at Palais des Congrès)
Max Graham
 
Silver Surfer
Superpowers: Lightning
speed and preternaturally quick reflexes. “I can spot a problem in a
nightclub before it happens, and deal with it right away, before anyone
gets hurt.”
How he got ’em: “I used to lie
on the grass near airport runways just to feel the power of the jets as
they would take off or land. Once I got a little too close and was
exposed to radiation.”
Secret identity: Johnny the
busboy. “Busboys are the unsung heroes of the club scene. They go
everywhere and no one pays any attention to them, but they’re the ones
who know best what’s going down on any given night, so they’re in the
best position to stop bad situations from happening.”
His kryptonite: Go-go dancers.
“Thank God that’s over. Well, except in California.”
Superhero idol: The Silver
Surfer. “He gets to fight crime and surf at the same time!”
Superhero crush: Wonder Woman
HQ: Re*Brand Records
Bal en Blanc mission: Noche
Blanca Party (Thursday, April 5 at Club Opera)
Joey Arias
 
Batman
Aliases: Mistress of
Seduction, Moonchild
Superpowers: Harnesses the
gravitational powers of the moon to bring lovers together
How he got ’em: “My astronaut
parents conceived and gave birth to me in the midst of the fullest
lunar eclipse ever.”
Secret identity: “A rock star.”
His kryptonite: The sun and
politicians.
Superhero idol: Batman. “So
many accessories.”
Superhero crush: Batman. “So
many toys. We’d make love all night long.”
HQ: Zumanity, Las Vegas
Bal en Blanc mission: White
Lies Party (Thursday, April 5 at Cabaret Mado)
Second Sun
 
Supergirl
Aliases: Antoine and Adam
Superpowers:“Second Sun never
sleeps. We fly around from gig to gig and we never tire.”
How they got ’em: “A secret
pill of even more secret provenance.”
Secret identity: “We don’t
bother. Superheroes in spandex is so 20th century.”
Their kryptonite: “A boring
night at a club playing bad music. It puts us to sleep.”
Superhero idol: Batman. “We
like his dark aesthetic.”
Superhero crush: Supergirl.
“Can’t go wrong with a blonde in tights.”
HQ: None, as they are in
perpetual motion, though their orbiting patterns seem to favour Miami.
Bal en Blanc mission: The Main
Event (Sunday, April 8 at Palais des Congrès)
Sherry Vine
 
Mystique
Alias: Keith Levy
Superpowers: By harnessing the
power of LOVE, is able to neutralize bigotry and hate
How she got ’em: “Years of
battling homophobia taught me how to wield the ultimate
weapon—kindness.”
Secret identity: “I can’t
divulge that, but it’s me in guy drag.”
Her kryptonite: Cute boys.
“Their very proximity makes me weak.”
Superhero idol: “I’m obsessed
with Mystique. Those legs!”
Superhero crush: Mystique, for
obvious reasons.
HQ: Theatre Couture, New York
Bal en Blanc mission: White
Lies Party (Thursday, April 5 at Cabaret Mado)
François Sagat
 
The Human Torch
Alias: Titan Man
Superpowers: Invisibility,
empathy and mind control
How he got ’em: His ancestors
were mediums
Secret identity: Janitor
His kryptonite: Cats
Superhero idol: Mystique
Superhero crushes: The Human
Torch and Robin
HQ: Titan Studios
Bal en Blanc mission: the Cuir
Experience Party (Saturday, April 7 at Bain Mathieu)
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