by CHRIS BARRY

Name: Buck

Age: 44

Occupation: Actor, writer, “gay handyman”

Bio: Seeking liberty from a romantic relationship turned awry in his home town of NYC, slightly less than one year ago this strapping Plateau Buck “packed up the car and moved to Montreal, singing the theme song to the Mary Tyler Moore Show the whole way.” The former Mr. Leather NYC 1993 and one time regular day player on the soap All My Children, Buck says he chose our humble burg because he needed a place he could drive to comfortably with his orange tabby cat Twister, a feisty feline who loves playing in snow. Currently just chillin’ while writing a musical production about his life and the Fire Island scene, he’s been paying the rent by selling himself on craigslist as “the gay handyman,” a fella as comfortable working on your leaky pipes as he is belting out Ethel Merman show tunes. Reach him via bucgraf@mac.com.

What the hell kind of difference is there between a gay handyman and a straight one? “Well, I always have my iPod with me and I sing along to the music. [Starts singing] ‘Fly me to the moon, let me play among the stars.’ Because if I’m going to do boring work, well, I’m going to sing. Sure, my headphones might get caught in my hammer every once in awhile, but still....”

Does his gay marketing angle really resonate with the public or do most people not really care one way or the other if the guy installing their kitchen cupboards takes it up the bum or not? “Oh yes, I think it does. I get hired by a lot of single women who want me because I’m gay and are nervous a [straight] handyman might stand around and gawk at them. Or I’m hired by women who just like to have a gay man around to talk to while I’m doing my job. They tell me their woes about their husbands and we stand around and talk about how men are pigs and so on. Some of them also want to have me help them, say, pick out their shoes, to do the girlfriend thing with them—but I won’t do that. Honestly, when I started marketing myself as the gay handyman I didn’t expect to be hired by so many women.”

Does he get many calls from potential customers inquiring if the handyman is as handy with a cock in his mouth as he might be wielding his hammer around? Occasionally, but not that often. “I tell them I’m the handyman, not the pizza boy.”

Childhood ambition: To become Bewitched star Elizabeth Montgomery. “I think one of the reasons so many gay men love her is because her character on the show had this secret.”

Musical preferences: Aaron Copland, Stephen Sondheim.

Last book read: “I don’t read because I have ADD. Reading really frustrates me. I even have trouble reading my own stuff.”

Words of wisdom: “People should treat people like they want to be treated themselves.”

Comments? dimwit@hdot.net