Dear Sasha: My boyfriend and I practise SM as part of our sex. Some of it is pretty rough, and recently he’s brought up the possibility of me piercing him—his nipples specifically and maybe his foreskin. The idea totally turned me on and we both look forward to fulfilling this fantasy without a trip to the ER as part of the scene. Do you know of any place that offers piercing workshops? I’m not afraid of blood and stuff like that, but it’s not something I want to try without a little instruction. —Stephania
Dear Stephania,
Despite the lack of authorized standards and official certification required to be a piercer (though a place like Winnipeg has regional bylaws and Toronto will be hit with them in January too), the consensus amongst the ones I spoke to is that no serious piercing place would offer workshops.
Most piercers learn their trade through apprenticeship, which is much more time-consuming and also involves being the grunt at the studio for up to a year. Veteran piercer Tom Brazda says there’s no easy way to teach someone this skill quickly, but what he did suggest is that you call local parlours and see if there’s anyone on hand who will do house calls, something he does himself, charging $100 just to show up. In this case, you’ll have the piercer on hand guiding you—maybe not the intimate scenario you’re looking for, but certainly a good way to get the basics down.
Dear Sasha: I totally get off on pornographic fiction and used to read a lot online. Lately, I find it harder and harder to find any pages that don’t require credit cards. I totally hate the thought of giving my credit card number, because not all the pages look trustworthy (and even signing up to some of them has created tons of spam). However, I’m not generally opposed to paying for a good story, but I’d prefer to do this, for example, with Paypal. Do you know of any sites that either offer pornographic fiction for free, or where one doesn’t have to give out one’s credit card number? —Sandra
Dear Sandra,
There are many ways to access written porn without compromising your credit card and getting spam galore. I like the dirty-ass shit myself, and so does my gal Violet Blue, who offers a selection of free stories for all your kinky interests on this page of her site: www.tinynibbles.com/erotica.html. She also edits erotic anthologies for Cleis Press, which you can find online at www.cleispress.com.
Heather Corinna’s also a lady to look out for—she’s behind Web sites like Scarleteen and Scarlet Letters—and she can be trusted not to spam you to death. There are some free samples of her work on her personal Web site www.femmerotic.com/words.html though no Paypal option. Since being bought by eBay, Paypal is no longer available on adult sites. Luckily you can still buy weapons with it though.
Three other free and extensive sites are www.literotica.com, www.cleansheets.com and www.asstr.org. The first two are snappy looking with a kibbutzy vibe, erotica reviews and some big names, while the Alt Sex Story Repository is your low-rent no frills zone with the occasional, and jarringly unpredictable, storyline involving children.
On a broader literary tip, if you’re looking for an entertaining and sophisticated graphic novel, look no further than Fun Home by Alison Bechdel. As an avid comic reader, I was never a big fan of Bechdel’s long-running strip Dykes to Watch Out For and I’m still lukewarm about it, but luckily, Peter Birkemoe, who runs the great comic book store the Beguiling (www.beguiling.com), can be very persuasive.
Bechdel’s coming-of-age tale in small-town Pennsylvania with a closeted queer father and the family’s funeral home as a backdrop is freaking brilliant. I know, I know, autobiographical comics often feel abusive in their unbosoming, but Bechdel’s reflective and poetic inferences, astonishing writing skills and quiet, Gorey-ish illustrations and inking make this an absorbing read. You’ll wonder just what the hell you’ve been getting out of your own therapy when you’re done with it.
Got any questions for Sasha? Email: POULEDELUXE@YAHOO.COM
