The announcement seemed incongruous, considering the Bush administration’s attitude toward conservation: For the first time since 1954, wetlands acreage had grown, growing by 191,800 acres between 1998 and 2004 to a total 107.7 million acres.

But it turns out that the White House wasn’t defining “wetlands” as the delicately balanced life-rich ecosystems one would expect. Instead, the Interior Department now includes any body of land that happens to be wet. Golf course water hazards, artificial ponds, sewage basins—the list falls just short of Dick Cheney’s Depends.

“Even ponds that are not a high-quality of wetlands are better than not having wetlands,” recently-departed interior secretary Gale Norton assured the public. Scientists vehemently disagree, citing long-standing knowledge that even smaller, naturally-occurring wetlands, like prairie potholes, sustain wildlife better than larger, man-made counterparts.

In taking office, Bush had promised a “no net wetlands loss” program that had the Army Corps of Engineers issuing wetlands drainage licences only to developers who would build equal-sized wetlands elsewhere. The Corps has recently been sued for failure to reveal any records of permit issuance or compliance since 2002.

» Scott Saxon