8 1/2 Bits: Ever wonder what your favourite video game characters are doing when the power’s off on the Sega Master System? Pixeled Parodies answers that question with plenty of flash animation and geeky hilarity. Want to see Simon Belmont from Castlevania dry-humped to death by a gang of jumping hunchback-monkey-gargoyle things? You got it. A shirtless, homoerotic take on Altered Beast with man-loving disco zombies? Check. The Bionic Commando guy with an extensible schlong in lieu of an arm? Checkeroonie at www.videogamedc.com/Pixeled_Parodies/pixeled_parodies.html.

Funny strange: Ever notice a pattern in Garfield comic strips? Frame One: Garfield is hungry. Frame Two: Jon is depressed. Frame Three: Garfield eats lasagna. Now rearrange those any dang way and it’ll still be a perfectly acceptable Garfield strip. Eagle_Fire (whoever or whatever that is) takes it one step further with the Garfield Randomizer. It’s like a slot machine, but your only prize is Dadaism. Compose your own arbitrary, directionless and unfunny Garfield strips (just like Jim Davis does every day!) at www.cs.washington.edu/homes/natetrue/gar.html.

Comments? Michael Citrome