All that’s missing is a Muslim on a unicycle and it’d be everything the Right fears most. Thank goodness all Georgia’s Covenant Christian Academy had to deal with was an underage girl with multiple partners of the same sex. And deal they did, kicking the ninth-grader out for kissing two other girls. Who cares if she did it on her own time, nowhere near school grounds? Well, apparently, her family.

Jessica Bradley had a GPA of 3.5 when she was called into her principal’s office along with several other girls and asked about the events of an all-girl slumber party a few days earlier. In particular, Principal Anthony Knight wanted to know about an “inappropriate relationship.” It was true: Jessica had kissed a girl at the party. At an earlier date, she’d kissed a different girl. After an hour of questioning, Bradley was asked to leave. She was God’s problem now. The Covenant Christian School, however, might be facing judgment of a different sort. The Bradleys have filed a million-dollar lawsuit for invasion of privacy and breach of contract.

» Scott Saxon